The Last Memory
by theaterinspired
Summary: He cant stop thinking about the all too recent and painful events. How could he live without her? Could he live without her? RizaxRoy
1. Chapter 1

**Hey people of the internet! Here I am with my first FMA fanfic! YAY! I wasnt going to write anything until after my exams but this came up anyway. My friend introduced me to something and I was like "What the heck? I could do better!" and so here i am in attempt to do just that. My only request is that you reveiw with everything you got! Here you go...  
~I do not own FMA, sadly. but i would try if that meant that I owned Mustang....**

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Roy Mustang stood at the river's edge watching the light dance across the water. It had rained that day. Actually, it had rained all week. It felt good to be outside again. He couldn't stay inside, the memories of the all too recent events made the office unbearable. He couldn't function without being reminded of the empty place. Even though the promotions in his team had been dealt with to fill the empty rank, the room was still empty. And after the battle, it would never be the same again.

***Flashback***

The smell of gun powder was lingering in the air as the sounds of gunfire were slicing through the air. Colonel Mustang stepped out of the tent with his team following closely behind. He was flanked by Lieutenant Hawkeye directly on his right and Second Lieutenant Havoc on his left with the rest falling into rank and step behind. It felt natural, as if it was just another day in the office. The team had their weapons drawn and Mustang pulled his gloves on. They were thankfully on the offense in the battle now, but the battle was just about to get rough.

Mustang looked around the ruins of the town that the battle was outside of. There weren't very many options, but he found what he needed. There was one building still standing with a vantage point that only a skilled shooter would be able to fire out of with clear, precise shots. Thankfully, he had one that could help to give cover as they tried to go towards the front lines so that he could have a clear line of fire.

Colonel Mustang turned to the Lieutenant and nodded at the run down building to the west of them, "Lieutenant Hawkeye, go up there and give us cover."

Hawkeye looked back at him, her eyes seeming hesitant to leave, "Sir, I don't know if the building is the safest place. I am sure that the cadets up there can give us cover…"

Mustang chuckled, "I never thought that you would ever worry about your own safety."

"It's not my safety, sir," Hawkeye corrected, "I just am thinking about…"

"Go," he said smiling, "That's an order." This time the Lieutenant didn't argue. She clicked her heels together and saluted, "Best of luck to you in battle sir."

He saluted back, "Don't worry, this battle is just wrapping up. Just do me a favor and don't get hurt, and I will do the same." With that, he turned back towards the battle field. "And don't forget to watch my back while I try and get close enough."

He led his men towards the front lines of the battle. That was his only complaint about being the Flame Alchemist. He had to be a little too close for comfort to the battle in order to be of any help. That was why he kept the best team, so that he wouldn't have to worry about them stabbing him in the back.

After about half an hour, Roy was becoming tired. Somehow the enemy was having an easy time at avoiding his attack. But now there was a small break in the cross fire. Roy took the second to catch his breath and looked at his team. They too seemed exhausted, but ready to keep their leader safe.

Warrant Officer Falman looked at the Colonel, "Sir, we are ready to move when you do."

"You are right," The Colonel sighed, "Strike it quickly and you'll end it quickly too," he reminded himself. He stood from his crouched position. They ran across the field without stopping. Whenever an enemy soldier came up to attack, as soon as they were in range to hit the team, they would be knocked dead by what appeared to be an invisible shooter. Roy couldn't help but smile; this was one of the reasons why he loved having the Lieutenant on the team.

Quickly they infiltrated the enemy lines thank to the "hawk's eyes". As soon as they cleared the middle of the field, the fire started to soar once more. Roy could hear the enemy shouting orders in a language that he didn't know, but he could hear the panic. He didn't take time to think; he just acted on his orders and snapped.

After what seemed like five minutes right on the enemy lines, Roy was starting to think the end truly was near. Thanks to Hawkeye getting rid of any threat that the rest of the team couldn't, he was able to shoot off flames left and right. But suddenly the urgent shouts changed in sound. They seem to be more direct. And the enemy soldiers were now pointing back across the fields.

"Sir," Havoc called over the shouting, "It's a cannon!"

Mustang turned and saw what Havoc was talking about. The enemy had now loaded a bomb into a cannon. Roy's eyes followed the imaginary path that he was formulating in his head of where the bomb would land. "No… it…" he muttered to himself as he rethought the trajectory of the cannon.

Just then he whipped around just in time to see an enemy soldier lunge at him. At the same time he heard the whiz of the cannon as the bomb was flung into the air towards the Amestrian camp. Just before Roy could get his hand out of his pocket, the attacker fell, with a bullet in his head. The sound of the bomb making impact split through the battle.

Colonel Mustang looked down at the newly killed enemy. He turned to Havoc with a puzzled expression on his face. Havoc answered the question before his commanding officer could ask it, "Hawkeye, sir."

Mustang smiled, he owed his Lieutenant another thank you. Just then he remembered what he was doing when he was distracted. The bomb, the cannon, the line of trajectory…

Roy spun on his heels and gasped in pure horror. Without thinking he ran back towards the camp as fast as he possibly could despite the shouts of protest from his team. This couldn't be happening. It was next to impossible. The building that was hit wasn't the one he had ordered his Subordinate into. It wasn't the building that was on fire. It wasn't true. Hawkeye was not in that building.

Just as he got about half way across the field, he heard his heart break. He stopped in shock as he watched the burning building collapse in a deafening roar. Mustang sunk to his knees in agony as he helplessly watched the slow movement and the building folded into itself without any resistance, killing all hope that Riza Hawkeye survived.

Then, something over took him. The Flame Alchemist stood and turned towards the enemy lines. He raised his trembling hand and snapped. The largest flame that he had ever issued overtook the enemy lines. It shot skyward and fell back on the enemy, incinerating everything in its path. He let it burn and watched as the flames licked over the land.

After a moment he found the strength and stood. Havoc, Fuery, Breda and Falman didn't move, they were still staring in shock at the flames that the alchemist had just thrown at the enemy on one side of the field and the fallen building on the other.

He walked numbly back to the camp. No one said anything to him. He came to his superior, Brigadier General Mya. The General held out his hands offering something to the Colonel and muttered, "I am sorry, Colonel."

Mustang looked down at what the General was handing him and his eyes swelled up with tears. It was Hawkeye's pistol.

Roy took it not saying anything, afraid that his voice would fail him. The general understood, "You and your men are dismissed."

"Thank you…" was all Roy Mustang could say. He turned and walked back to his tent and closed the flap. No one saw him until they were ready to move out the next day.

***End Flashback***

That was how it had happened. When they came back, the entire team was promoted to fill the empty rank. Havoc was now the Lieutenant. Havoc had actually tried to turn it down, but Mustang had pushed. "I can't have anyone else be in that role. You have it. I want you there."

"But Sir," Havoc had said looking at the floor, "I don't want to take her place."

"She would want us to keep moving," Mustang had told him, "Just because some of us fall, doesn't mean that we can just stop moving. Eventually we will meet up with each other again." It had been hard to say even then, but Roy Mustang had to be strong.

Colonel Mustang looked up to the sky. He held her gun in his hands while he was sitting on the bank. She had once said when they were drinking that this was her favorite place and he could see why. The way that the sun's golden rays hit the water making it sparkle was just breath taking. It reminded him of her eyes for some reason.

He stood and approached the river's edge looking at the gun that had protected her as well as him many times.

"Riza," he chocked at the name, "I am so sorry. I never meant for you to leave me like this." He was trying not to cry, "I thought that you would always be with me. But I was naïve, we are soldiers in war. " He stopped, trying to find his voice again. "Ha..Havoc, didn't want to take the role of Lieutenant on the team. But I told him that's what you would want. That is what you would want, right?"

The words were becoming harder to find "And… Black Hayate is staying with me. I hope you don't mind, but you know me and dogs…"

He couldn't do this any longer, the tears were already starting to swell in his eyes. He looked down at the gun, and took the bullets out and put them in his pocket, "I hope you don't mind, but I wouldn't want this to harm someone." With that he tossed the gun into the river and watched it flow downstream until the current swallowed it up.

Roy Mustang turned away, and the tears started to fall. He laughed, "Hey Riza, Did I tell you that it's been raining every day since you left?"

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**Tell me what you think! PLEASE! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, this idea WAS going to be a oneshot, but my friends were depressed that I killed her. So now we are tag teaming it into a full story, so stay tuned. The only thing about it being longer is that how long is yet to be determined. Yes this is all very sad and it will be for a while. I hope to talk them into a filler that is full of comedy to lighten the moods on days like this week where we read chapter 102. /3 as a fan girl, its heart breaking what happened. Im actually wearing black for a while... i think for a week.. we shall see. Anwho, here is another chapter that i wrote with editing and help by friends. When they write a chapter i will post it and give them the credit at the top. thanks and enjoy :D**

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The office had been unnaturally quiet recently, and today was no exception. Everyone was working on paperwork, finishing it very slowly. Even Mustang filled out the papers according to the questions asked.

The door opened and Edward Elric came into the room. He came up to the Colonel and stopped in front of the desk. He did not move nor did he speak.

"Do you have something to say Fullmetal, or are you just going to stand there like an idiot?"

Ed opened and closed his mouth a few times, then a look of sadness shown in his eyes. He had no clue what to say. He realized that nothing would make any difference.

Mustang stood keeping his eyes on his desk. Edward started slowly, unsure of how to act, "Colonel, I just came to tell you that Al and I are headed back to…"

"Resembol, I know. I already told you that you are dismissed to go wherever the hell you want. Just check in so that the military can find you. I don't care."

Edward glanced at the remaining team members of Mustang's team. They kept their heads down ignoring the conversation taking place between the two alchemists. They had probably seen a lot of the Colonel acting this way and just tried to keep going without taking anything personally.

"Colonel, I am sorry, I know…" Edward started trying to think of what to say to the man.

But apparently those were the wrong words, "I don't need your sympathy. And you don't know. You never will know. You have never lost anyone forever in battle. You have never been responsible for sending someone to their death. You don't know anything Edward. You're just a kid."

Edward had had it now. For some reason today, he didn't have the energy to deal with this sort of attitude anymore. He knew that the Colonel was wrong, Edward and Alphonse had dealt with the death of their mother. He didn't mind the Colonel grieving, but if Mustang talked to anyone but Edward like this, things would become worse than they already were, "No I haven't done any of those things and I might be a kid. But I don't stop functioning because the world kept turning and someone decided to get off. I keep living."

"I am living," Mustang muttered.

"No, you're not," Ed corrected, his voice becoming soft. "I saw you at the funeral. You didn't even go and say anything. You just stood there staring blankly far off into the distance. And now you are actually doing your paperwork? Face it, when she left, you fell apart." With that Ed left the room without looking back, closing the door behind him, leaving the office silent.

Mustang sat back down. The kid did have a point. He had fallen apart and it didn't seem like it was about to get any better not without her at least. She had been his constant and was always there for him.

The room was back to the way it was before the kid showed up. Mustang looked out the window, he couldn't concentrate right now. Something was nagging him in the back of his head. It had been there before, but he couldn't put his finger on it. If Huges was here, he would be there to help Mustang get through this in one piece. Next to the Lieutenant, Maes Huges was one of the people that knew the flame alchemist the most.

His eyes widened in realization. He now knew when he had felt the feeling in the back of his mind before, when Huges had died. Mustang would never admit it to anyone, but when he had first learned of Huges' death, he had thought about ways to bring him back. This was that feeling, only more intense than ever before.

The Colonel shook the thought from his head. What was he thinking? Was he really contemplating trying to bring the Lieutenant back from the dead? No, he couldn't. He shouldn't. It was against everything that he had ever been told or had taught. The dead needed to remain just that, dead. It was a stupid, farfetched, and idealistic idea. Even if he did try, he would fail seeing as he didn't have the Philosopher's stone. Even if he had the stone, what would be of equal value? What could he give in order to bring her back?

No, he shouldn't think of such things. Roy Mustang sighed and walked back to the office after retrieving his pocket watch from the librarian. He was foolish. He shouldn't just go around and decide when to bring back a life. But then again, didn't he did decide when to end other's lives. Was it really that different from bringing someone back?

Mustang walked slowly back to his desk and sighed heavily. A new stack of papers were awaiting his attention. If the Lieutenant was there, she would discreetly help him get though the papers as fast as possible. She had gotten so good as to be able to forge his signature perfectly. But she wasn't there, and she wouldn't be.

He looked at the first paper that was sitting on top of his own personal mountain. He smiled, one spark on top could turn the mountain into a volcano. Then again, what would that actually do in the long run? He picked up his pen and started to fill in the first blank with his name and rank. This was the type of monotonous work that he would get rid of when he was in charge. That was, if he would ever be in charge. He needed a support team under him to help him up, but he lost two of the supports already. By the time this was over, would he have a good support, or would it prove faulty and weak, allowing him to slip through the cracks?

The paper seemed to be very long. He moved from blank to blank, filling in the activity of the team from that past week. He started off with the battle. This took a while, seeing as everything had to be accounted for in accuracy.

_"…We walked out to the battle field at 1750 according to the orders given by Brigadier General Mya. To help provide better protection while we attempted to infiltrate the enemy lines, Lieutenant Ha-.." _The Colonel stopped writing. He couldn't keep the pen still in his hands because they were shaking so badly. He looked up at the clock on the wall. Thankfully, it was time to leave for the day. He put the pen down, stood and went to the door. He put his hand on the door handle and heard the shuffle of papers. "Oh right," he thought, "The rest of the team is still here." They were either really quietly recently, or he really was that distracted that he didn't notice those around him.

"Men, you are dismissed."

They looked up at him blankly. Lieutenant Havoc stood, "Are you sure chief? I mean, there still is a lot of paper work that needs to be filled, seeing as how we fell behind this week."

Mustang smiled, "Don't worry; it'll still be here in the morning for us. Go, you've been working overtime all week; you deserve to go have some fun."

The soldiers looked at one another and shrugged. They grabbed their belongings and left. Fuery stopped and watched the Colonel until they were the last two in the room. "Fuery, are you coming?" Mustang asked.

Furey nodded, as he walked towards the door. Just before he passed Mustang, he stopped and looked his superior in his eyes, "You will be okay sir."

Roy looked at the ground; he couldn't stand to look the young subordinate in the eyes. They had too much hope and expectation in them. "In time, I think so" he replied. He was slightly startled by his own answer; he didn't mean to be this honest.

"No," Fuery corrected, "It wasn't a question sir. You will be." With that he left the Colonel and ran to meet up with Falman.

Mustang walked back into the room, it was a mess. Papers were thrown all across the room in an unorganized fashion. Roy started to clean up. Most of the papers were paperwork that had been thrown around in frustration. After the floor was clean he started to clean off the desks. It was nothing unusual.

He came to Fuery's desk, which was normally the most clean only next to Hawkeyes. Today however there was one paper that was stuck in a drawer, half sticking up. Mustang pulled it out of the drawer and was just about to add it to the pile on the desk when he saw a familiar script on it. He knew that it was wrong to read other's papers but he couldn't help it; it had Hawkeye's hand writing on it.

_Fuery,_

_I am sorry that you have to read this, but I need you to do three things if this ever finds its way to you:_

_1: Keep moving forward and drag the rest of the team with you. I'll catch up with you eventually._

_2: Protect Mustang since I am no longer able and help him get to the top. His idea that you should protect those under you works to a point. You run into the question of if you are on top, who protects you?_

_3: If you are reading this, then things must be hard. And if things are really rough, just remember that you will be okay, all of you. That is a promise._

_Sincerely,_

_Riza Hawkeye_

Mustang put the letter down. He shouldn't have read it. That was it. He should not have read it.

Mustang left the building and groaned, it was pouring rain. He stepped out of the door way and into the open. Strangely, the rain felt good. He didn't mind the walk.

Mustang passed the river. The rain drops danced on the water, causing a ripple with each hit. The rain recently formed a strange solace for the Flame Alchemist. It was soothing for once instead of causing worry. The rain meant that he couldn't make a sparks, which meant no fire. And that was exactly it, there was no fire.

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**And that's that. Tell me what you think! I'm trying really hard to stay in character, and my friends and I are working on it. Just tell me what you think is OOC and I will look into it. Some of my characterization is hard to follow, but it does have strong logic with the desisions. I'm even okay with flames! Just reveiw! its not raining where we are so you can make sparks ;D. I even would welcome your thoughts on chapter 102. JUST TALK TO ME! thanks :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, here is another chapter in time for the holidays. My family is going to visit family and my parents are saying when we will be back, so Im not sure when another chapter will be posted. Just remember to tell me what you think. I love to hear from all of you. And if you see something that is majorly OOC tell me what or where because I am trying really hard to do that for this, which i am finding strangely difficult. Thanks and Happy Holidays!**

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By the time that Mustang made it back to his apartment, he was sopping wet. He closed the door silently and then slid to the floor without bothering to turn on the lights. Black Hayate cautiously approached the man keeping his tail between his legs. Mustang didn't even acknowledge the dog. He just sat on the floor watching the water runoff the end of his hair onto the floor.

Black Hayate nudged the Colonel with his nose. After gaining no response, the dog ran over to a coffee table and gingerly picked up the picture that had been laying face down on it. Black Hayate brought the picture over to Roy and laid it down in front of him. The dog nudged the man and whimpered softly. The dog laid his head on Mustang's knee and whined. Still with no response, the canine got up, walked to the bedroom, and hid underneath the bed.

Mustang picked up the picture and turned it over. He smiled sadly. It was a picture of the team taken before any deaths. They all looked so happy. Fuery's eyes were shining with anticipation, Huges had his infamous grin of challenge pasted on his face, Havoc was as smug as ever, Breda looked ready, and Falman was… well, Falman. Then he saw her in the picture and flinched. Her eyes were determined and focused, as they always were.

Roy Mustang threw the picture across the room and leaned his head back against the door, looking up at the ceiling. "Damn I miss her," he cursed. All fell silent except for the rhythmic pounding of rain against the building.

_

He was walking through a white room, if you could call it a room. There was no obvious beginning or end to this area. It was odd; he didn't know where he was. He just started to walk in one direction and not stopping. He didn't know what was going on, but he felt oddly calm here.

"Colonel, where are you going?" He heard the voice and stopped. It couldn't be happening, not now. He knew that he had been losing it for a while now and he had been expecting to start hearing her, but he didn't like it now when he had no idea where he was. He felt a hand on his shoulder, "Sir, what are you doing?"

As right as this felt, he had to keep his head. There was a reality that he couldn't forget about. The burning building was real without a doubt. He had felt the ground shake. "I am walking Lieutenant, what else?"

"Very well sir," she said. He didn't dare turn around, so he kept walking. He could hear the sound of her foot steps behind him, but he didn't stop.

After a while of walking he stopped, "Lieutenant, how far does this place go?"

"I have yet to find an end to it, Sir." He reluctantly turned around. He couldn't help but smile. She was there in front of him just as she always had been.

"I guess there wouldn't be an end. Its not real. You're not real," he rationalized.

"What do you mean? You can see me, hear me, touch me, why am I not real?"

"Because you're gone, and you're not coming back. It's the stupid reality that exists," he answered his voice breaking as he admitted the hard truth to himself. "This must be a dream. That's all it ever could be, a dream."

"It doesn't have to be that way, sir."

"Yes, it does," He snapped, "Do you really want me to do that? To possibly contemplate doing that… I would fail, you know that." He sunk to his knees and hot tears started to spill from his eyes. "I couldn't do that to you. I could never think… I killed you once, I couldn't do it again."

She knelt down next to him, and put an arm around him, "Do you want me to leave, sir," she asked after a moment. He had expected her to look hurt; he was ready for that when he had finished talking. He wasn't ready for her loyalty and trust to be given to him so easily. He had been expecting blame and guilt to be hurled at him at amazing speeds, but it never came. It hurt more that she was calm than if she had started to yell at him.

"I never said that," he said as he grabbed her hand when she tried to stand.

"Good, because I never will."

-

Mustang awoke with a start and squinted at the clock. He jumped up; he was going to be late. He ran quickly to the bedroom and pulled on a clean uniform. He patted Black Hayate on the head and sprinting out the door. It was still drizzling rain, but he didn't care. He made it to the office in record time.

He came through the door and was met with surprised eyes. The team sat at their desks with very dwarf sized piles of paperwork left. Mustang went and sat at his desk. He was shocked, the desk was clear. "Do any of you know what happened to my pile of paperwork?"

They looked up at him, "What mountain? I don't remember you leaving such a thing," Havoc said while still looking at his desk.

Mustang noticed the boxes of filled paperwork that were sitting on his subordinates' desks. They were unusually full for the amount of paper work that they normally had. The Colonel was smart enough to put two and two together. All that they had left for him to do was to read some reports.

At about 1100 hours he was done. Mustang looked out the window and let his mind wonder. It had now stopped raining and the sun was trying hard to push through the clouds.

The phone rang making everyone jump. Mustang answered it. "Sir, it's Edward Elric from an outside line," the operator told him.

What could he want now? "Patch him through."

When he heard the phone click, he made sure that he was the first to speak, "You just couldn't give me a moment's peace, couldn't you Fullmetal?"

Edward's smarmy attitude could be felt radiating through the receiver, "Well, sir, you did tell me to check in when I went somewhere."

"Mission accomplished, would you like a badge of honor to go with that smart attitude?" The Flame Alchemist retorted. "What do you really want?"

"Uh… Al wanted me to make sure you didn't have something you needed to get done that we could help with."

Roy smiled; the kid was as transparent as glass sometimes. "No for the fifth time. Just go do what you want and next time check in with the local branch!" With that he slammed down the receiver to make his point.

He stopped and listened. It was too quiet. He looked up at the rest of the team. They were watching him expectantly.

"What should we do now sir? There are no meetings or paperwork left for the day," Breda asked.

Mustang knew that they had been there for a long time. He felt like they should be dismissed, but sadly that wasn't allowed. "Do you have something you would like to do that you could claim as work?"

"I've been meaning to go check some records," Havoc said. The others agreed to go and help him, leaving Mustang alone in the room. He grabbed his jacket and headed out the door. He needed to keep himself involved in his work. If he stopped, even for a moment, he might fall asleep, and he didn't want to face that. So he was going to drown himself in research. What he was going to research, he didn't know. He did know that something was better than nothing. And anything was better than his own thoughts.

Once at the library, Colonel Mustang had walked to the section reserved for State Alchemists only. He now found himself in front of the bioalchemy books. This was the form of alchemy he knew the least about and he was now curious.

A few hours later, Mustang decided it was time to leave and return back to the office. He picked a few choice books that he was finding interesting and started back after checking them out. The sky was still grey, but there was no sign of rain yet to come.

Roy Mustang stopped by the river and looked down into it from the bridge he was standing on. The river was just that today, a river. It didn't dance or sparkle, it just flowed. He crossed the bridge and stood on the banks. He looked into the river and saw himself reflected back.

It had been a while since he had looked at himself. His eyes had circles under them from his lack of decent sleep. He looked run down, like he was still standing in the rain. He heard laughter and looked up.

On the other side of the river a little farther downstream was a family playing with a little toy boat on a string. The little boy, who only looked to be about three or so, held his mother's hand while pointing excitedly at the tiny blue sail boat. The father was running ahead with the string making the boat move along the river. They all laughed and smiled as the boy ran to catch-up to his father and the boat. The mother picked up a forgotten teddy bear and ran to join them, they looked perfectly happy as if nothing mattered but what they were doing right then.

Mustang's stomach started to twist. He couldn't be that happy. The only reason he had been able to in the past was because either the Lieutenant or Huges had been there to help him be happy. Even during the war, one of them was always present. They both had been his constants and his best friends. When he didn't think that things would ever look up, one of them would be there smiling at him. And she was there for him the most out of anyone.

And now, quiet frankly, he was having trouble. He didn't deserve to be there. The only reason he kept moving was because he hated the thought of facing everyone if he did stop. But he wasn't sure he could keep this up. He wasn't sleeping, he wasn't eating, and he wasn't fighting. He needed her more than he had realized.

Mustang turned and finished walking back to the office, and he forced himself to focus on what he had been working on in the library, "Thirty five liter of water, twenty kilograms of carbon, four liters of ammonia, one and a half liters of lime…"

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**duh, duh, duhhh. This had some key points, and yes part of it might seem OOC, but i did my research. So let me know if you find some because if i dont have a reason why its that way then i shall fix it. thanks for your help. READ AND REVEIW :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry that this is shorter than the others, but it needed to end where it does for orginzational reasons. Its had been started a while ago, I just couldnt seem to find a way to do it. The next chapter will be difficult too, but it will be longer. Its not my favorite chapter by far, but not to worry dear readers! Its a snowday today for me (hence why this is posted when it is), and tomorow I get off even if the roads are okay becuase of my school's calander, so you should have the other chapter on time, (which for me is on mondays), if not early. Enjoy! **

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Envy, Lust and Gluttony all sat around a table at an uninhabited diner. Envy stared out of the foggy window while Gluttony gnawed slowly at the table. Lust looked her cool eyes towards Envy, studying his movements.

"So what are we going to do?" Envy inquired impassively.

Lust sighed, "We know what his next move his going to be. Wrath has been keeping the Colonel under strict surveillance. Apparently the Flame Alchemist has been spending more and more time at the library when he's not busy in the office."

"And let me guess," Envy continued keeping his eyes out the window while slight anticipation entered his voice, "Wrath has been 'helping' him find the time by not giving him a heck of a lot to do?"

"So it seems."

The room was silent for a few seconds before Envy pulled himself out of the booth they were sitting in and stretched, "Just tell me when to give him the stone." He held his hand out anxiously.

A smile spread across Lust's lips, "You won't be giving it to him at all. I will."

Envy gawked, "Why you?"

"Let's just say, Father decided that I give it to him because my skill set might be slightly more helpful than yours. We all know that the Flame Alchemist is credited with being a womanizer." With that Lust stood up and headed towards the door.

"Lust," Gluttony asked pulling his mouth away from the table, "Can I go with you, Lust?"

"No, Gluttony, stay here." With that she left without another word, turning the red stone in her hand over.

The wind hit Lust hard whipping her hair around her. She was relieved that it wasn't raining, but the wind still bothered her. She walked at a brisk pace across the capital. She had been told what had transpired, but she didn't care. It was hard for her to decipher the emotions of the Colonel, but that put her on edge. Toying with emotions was one of her strengths, but even she doubted that Roy Mustang would be driven to the breaking point.

She arrived outside the library and looked up into an open window. It was now early morning and there was only one light still on, she could guess who it was still working in the library. She stealthily tiptoed into the building past the guards and to the room with the light.

Lust stopped just outside the partially closed door. She realized that she lacked the jacket that she normally wore when on a delicate mission such as this; he would easily be able to know what she was. It was too late to turn back without causing consequences that would be difficult to track. She smiled coolly and tucked her hair behind her ear. _"I guess the first real test of his mental state will be whether or not he attacks me on the spot,"_ she thought to herself.

She pushed gently at the door, holding the Philosopher's Stone tightly in her hand. The door creaked loudly and Lust peered inside.

On the floor sitting cross legged sat Roy Mustang. He looked thinner than Lust remembered him, and his eyes had bags beneath them. It was obvious that he hadn't had adequate sleep in a long time. Around him were piles of books that could rival some mountains that Sciezska was infamous for having in her home.

Lust entered the room and stood directly before the Colonel. She looked down at the book he was reading that was covered in transmutation circles. Some of them she recognized while others seemed almost alien, but then again, she never studied alchemy.

"Damn, what am I missing?" Lust jumped at the sudden outburst from Mustang talking to himself. It was time for her to try and make a move.

"Well, I would say the first thing you will need is a Philosopher's Stone," she answered smoothly.

Mustang looked up at her, and she was immediately able to see that his eyes had changed. They weren't as focused. His head snapped back to the book, "Well, yes, that would be an asset to it, but I don't see any of those lying around free for the taking, do you?"

Lust got on her knees, "Are you saying that you would use one to bring her back?"

His eyes met her's, "Who the hell are you?"

"Name's Lust," She replied. "And you are trying to avoid the question. Would you be willing to use the Philosopher's Stone to bring back your subordinate?"

He broke the eye contact, "I don't have one, and so it doesn't matter, does it?"

"A subordinate or a stone? Don't you have subordinates that could look for the stone for you?" She knew that if she kept pushing and reminding him of what he already knew then it would be easier ensure that he attempted the transmutation.

A sad smile spread across his face, "Well, yes, but I doubt that they would just hand it over to me. Besides, the people I know currently looking would not only chew me out for thinking this but I couldn't take it from them. They have their own agenda for the stone, and I have no right to stop them from their goal so that I can make mine."

Lust laughed, "What?" Mustang puzzled.

"You are still neglecting to answer the first question. I want to know that, if by some miracle you were to get your hands on a stone, you would try to bring back the Lieutenant back from the dead?"

Mustang closed the book and pushed it away from himself, "I won't do it without the stone. But I know that I can't get one soon enough for it to be of any use. I've done enough research to know that if I don't try soon that no matter how much other preparation I did, nothing would work. She would be too far within the gate for me to pull her back."

"Well then Colonel, it's your lucky day. I come with a proposition," Lust said with a sly accent on the words.

Roy Mustang looked up at her, "I'm tired of this game. I know what you are, I am just too damn tired to fight and win against you."

Lust glanced around the room, "You give me too much credit Colonel."

"Why should I trust you? The Homunculi seem to always have a scheme that help you and set us back," he snapped at her.

Lust put on a hurt face, "Just because you know what doesn't mean that you know who I am. I want to help you. The least you could do is hear me out."

"What?" Mustang said, throwing her a death stare. She was surprised that he was actually willing to listen and not attack seeing as he knew what she was.

"Here," she tossed him the stone, "Use that. No strings, just the promise that you will try and bring Riza Hawkeye back to life. And you need to do it soon if you want any hope of success."

He flinched at the mention of the Lieutenant's name. Weariness shone in his eyes, "Why do you want to help me?"

She stood and walked to the door, leaving him, "We do have a sense of sympathy; we are at least that much human."

Mustang turned the stone over in his hand, carefully studying it. Was this really going to be all that simple? His research was more thorough than that of what people who had tried human transmutation in the past had done. He knew the mistakes and covered for them well. He needed to be very specific and patient. It would take the better part of one whole night, and that was if everything went well.

He looked up and clock. It was time for him to clean up and go to the office. He quickly put the books away and left the library. If all went according to plan, this would be the last all-nighter that he would have to pull. He just hoped that his subordinates wouldn't say anything about the recent lack of sleep he had been having.

Mustang entered the office and stopped right before the door. His hand clenched the stone tightly, he needed to hide it. The question was where to put it. Surely not someplace that it could be found by someone else. He looked for a pocket to put it in, and instead found his pocket watch. He clicked the watch open and placed the stone inside. He was surprised that the stone fit fine allowing him to close the watch securely and place it back in his pocket.

He pushed open the door and sighed. Alphonse Elric stood by the window behind the Colonel's desk, and Edward stood next to him. They looked as if they were waiting for him to come into the office. Mustang didn't know what they were doing, but he could identify one thing: the Fullmetal Alchemist looked furious.

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**Duh, duh duh! So thats where I leave you this chapter. dont forget....**

**right here**

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	5. Chapter 5

**okay, to start this off, i appologize for not posting last week. My friends (for those of you who read DEAR ABBY, its the crew that inspired those kids,) have taken a liking to this. So they have been giving me input. Which lead to this chapter taking me a while because I have reorganized somethings in my mind. This chapter had to be written three times before I got it where I want it. The next posting is left to be determined on the date becuase a friend wants to write it and i shall let her so i can work hard on the emotional stuff yet to come. (remember everything up to this point? good becuase I am not going to recap.) Writting from Team Mustang's point of veiw was fun and challenging, a good warm up. Oh! and please reveiw. you all are pathetic when it comes to this, if i do say so myself. Give me your guesses as to what the team learns. you will see what i mean. and here ya go!**

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Breda, Falman, Havoc and Fuery all sat in the silent office looking at the closed door. After about half of the work day, Mustang had left saying that he needed to do some research. They had stopped asking questions for a time, but as this routine became more frequent, they became worried.

"It makes sense," Breda said breaking the silence. "He wants to be alone and the library is a pretty lonely place."

"What are worrying me are his motives. What is he doing?" Falman asked.

Havoc stood, "Well there are two ways to answer that question. One is that we send Fuery here to go and spy on him…"

"No way!" Fuery defended himself.

Havoc laughed, "Which is why we'll have to turn to plan B. We can go though his desk."

"No," Falman argued sternly, "He will find out."

"Not if we're careful and don't leave any traces," Havoc said with an air of confidence in his voice. "Besides, he never locks the drawers." Havoc stood and walked over to the Colonel's desk. It had been kept oddly clean recently, a habit that had recently been adopted.

Havoc tried to open the first drawer to no success, it was locked. All of them were. "Well that's not suspicious," Havoc muttered sarcastically.

"Could you pick the lock?" Falman suggested.

Havoc shook his head, "No, they all are locked. It would take too long or it would show that that's what happened… If we are really desperate we could just take a crow bar to them."

"That would be very obvious," Breda argued.

"I was kidding Breda."

"Oh well, "Fuery said dismissively yet with relief, "I guess it was never meant to be."

A grin spread across Havoc's face as his eyes lighted with an idea, "There's no need to worry, and I know where a key is." Havoc walked over to where Hawkeye's old desk stood, neglected and empty for over two weeks now. None of them wanted to be the one to clean it out, so everyone pretty much avoided it. He carefully ran his fingers along the bottom until he located it. He pulled the key out and walked back to the Colonel's desk.

"How did you know?" Breda asked, amazed at the accomplishment.

Havoc shrugged, "I figured that she would have had a spare key for his desk. She always had spares to give to him when needed."

He put the key in the top drawer on the right and it clicked open. Breda approached cautiously "What's in it?"

"A date book," Havoc said as he threw the book at Fuery. "See if he is going anywhere he shouldn't."

Fuery flipped through it casually to the current month, "He's not doing anything at all. He had been pretty unsocial as of late with no future plans written down."

"Doesn't surprise me, he probably stopped using it once Hawkeye died," Havoc reasoned. There was an awkward silence that followed. That had been happening a lot recently; anytime one of them brought up her name, it was soon followed with silence.

Falman took the date book and flipped through it to look at the past months to see if there were any pieces that they had missed because of misfiling. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary until he looked back a few months. "Where were we on January 29th through the 31st of this year?"

Breda walked over to his desk calendar "All of us were at winter training up north. Why?"

"According to this," Falman explained, "He had a bunch of dates during that time. I don't remember him leaving, do you?"

The other members of the team shook their heads, "I don't think he did leave."

Breda took the book and read aloud the times and names that were listed during those three days in order, "1350 Caroline Olivia, 1400 Cecilia, 1450 Natalie Chloe, 1550 Hannah T. Olivia, 1600 Noel Hannah V., 2000 Pauline…"

"This makes no sense," Falman said as he stood and moved to an area of the room with more space. "There are too many similarities."

"What do you mean?" Fuery inquired looking around at the others to see if he was the only clueless one there.

"Well, look," Falman showed them the book and explained, "The times are too close together for the meetings to do anything. On two occasions they are only ten minutes apart. Another thing is that the names Olivia and Hanna come up twice. The chances of that occurring are very rare. And," he said as he turned a few pages back, "Some names are in here many times but not in the same order so they aren't first and last names."

"Maybe it's just a coincidence?" Fuery suggested.

"It's possible, but even I have to admit that it does seem a little odd," Havoc said. He walked back to the desk. "Falman, write those names down, just the ones on the 29th through the 31st because we know that he didn't meet with those people on those days."

Falman did as instructed and tucked the paper safely into his coat pocket. He then proceeded to throw the date book back to Havoc who placed it in back into the desk. Havoc then proceeded to open the top left drawer.

"What's in this one?" Fuery asked curiously.

Havoc pulled out a book and inspected it, "It looks like a book of transmutation circles. It's hard to tell, there are no descriptions that I recognize."

The others came and crowded around him. He flipped through the pages and confirmed his first analysis. The book contained what appeared to be transmutation circles for different types of transmutations.

Havoc looked at the others, "I take it you guys have as good a guess as I do about what these are specifically for?" The shook their heads, "Yeah, that's what I thought."

Just then the phone rang making the entire team jump. They quickly scrambled and tossed the book back in the drawer. Fuery pushed the drawer shut, locked it, and pocketed the key. Falman and Breda hurried and slid into their seats by their desks. Havoc picked up the phone, "This is Mustang's office."

"Hey, Havoc," Edward Elric's voice came over the phone.

Havoc sighed in relief, "Hey, Fullmetal. What's up?"

"Is the Colonel in? I wanted to know if he had any new cases for me to take on. It's been really quiet lately."

"No," Havoc admitted, leaning on the desk, "He's at the library again."

A note of worry sounded in the teenager's voice, "Has he been there a lot recently?"

"Yeah, more and more as time has gone by," Havoc answered truthfully.

"What are you thinking Havoc? Don't tell him everything!" Breda warned.

Havoc pulled away from the receiver and covered it with his hand. He looked at the others and said in a loud whisper, "I won't tell him everything, but he could tell us what the transmutation books are saying or maybe even give some insight as to the strange date book." A look of horror spread across their faces.

"But what if we get the Colonel in trouble?" Fuery worried.

"It's either Fullmetal or Armstrong, which would you prefer?" Havoc questioned.

They all looked at each other and said at the same time, "Fullmetal." They knew that Armstrong was a great person, but Edward seemed to understand the grieving that Roy Mustang was going though. He would be a better source of advice.

Havoc returned his attention to the phone, "Sorry Ed, What were you saying?"

"I was just asking if Mustang was doing anything else… strange." Edward said cautiously.

Havoc scratched the back of his head, "Well, to be honest," he started slowly. "I did happen to find a book of transmutation circles on his desk. They aren't labeled. And we also found his date book, but some things don't match up with what we know."

There was silence on the other end for a moment before Edward's voice came in a rush, "Can you describe to me one of the most complicated ones you see? I want to know if I recognize the book."

"Uh, sure," Havoc said hesitantly. He looked at Fuery and nodded. Fuery unlocked the drawer again and handed the book to Havoc, who flipped through the book to what he thought was the most complicated. It looked hard to explain but he tried his best, "***There is a transmutation circle that was a two circles on the outside, then writing with six big symbols in set six points, then another circle that contained and hexagon, which contained a circle. That circle contains a triangle connecting three of the eight symbols that are at the meeting points of the hexagon. Oh, and each of the symbols that make up the six points there are line going across the circle… There's a lot of writing on it too…. I'm sorry Fullmetal, that's as good of a description I can really give."

"No," Edward said, "That was good enough. Just tell me this, how many 'big symbols' are there total?"

Havoc looked at the book and counted, "Nine total that are big."

"And how many circles of writing are there?"

"Three and three half arcs as well."

"And let me guess those are half arcs are found at the corners of the triangle, right?" Edward said with a groan.

"Yup," Havoc said. He tossed the book back to Fuery who put it in the desk, but didn't lock the drawer yet. "What does all of that mean chief?"

"I won't say yet. You said something about a date book?" Edward remembered. "Can you tell me what specifically you found that was strange?"

"It says that he had some dates with some girls, but we know that he didn't because he was with us the entire time," Havoc mentioned as Falman handed him the note with the girls on it. He read them off to the eldest Elric. When he was done he waited for a minute to give the kid a moment to process all of this, "Any ideas?"

Havoc could have sworn that he heard the rustling of papers on the other end of the line. Edward was silent for a few minutes before he said anything, "I am sure that you have nothing to worry about. It's just part of the grieving process."

Havoc could tell that Fullmetal was downplaying what was actually occurring; it was obvious in his voice. "Okay, then. What should we do then?"

"Just keep an eye on him. If it becomes evident that he is doing something stupid, stop him. Otherwise just do what you always do and support him."

"Okay then," Havoc said carefully. "I guess we will see you around then. Do you want me to tell the Colonel you called?"

"No," Edward said in a hurry, "I'll get in touch with him later. Bye!" And with that he hung up leaving Havoc without another word.

Havoc hung up the phone. "What did he have to say?" Breda asked.

"He said it was nothing to worry about. He just said that we should just keep doing what we already are," Havoc relayed, taking the key out of the lock in its drawer and pocketing the key.

"So what did he actually mean?" Fuery asked, "Is it really something we should worry about, or was he just saying that?"

Havoc sat down, "Fullmetal knows something he's not telling us, but unless we know what that is we can't do anything. I think Fullmetal will tell us when to worry."

"Yes, but…" Falman started to say until he was cut off but the sound of the door handle turning. Fuery rushed back to his desk and sat down before the door opened. Colonel Mustang walked in and hung his jacket up without a word to his team.

They watched as their leader walked to his desk and sat down. The team held their breath as they watched him unlock and open the drawer and place a new book in the same drawer as the one with the datebook. He closed the drawer once the book was inside. The others sighed when he pulled out some paper work and started filling it out without even glancing at the team.

_"Yes,"_ Havoc thought, _"There is something going on that Fullmetal isn't telling us, but something tells me that I should leave it to the alchemists. Maybe the Elrics can help him more than I can. That was Hawkeyes real job, helping him mentally, and I can never replace her in that role."_

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**TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK! predictions, suggestions, questions, comments, concernes, flames, ANYTHING! I want to hear from you. I can see you are reading! just click and send me a five minute reveiw! PlEaSe? YeS, i KnOw ThAt EvErY oThEr LeTtEr Is In CaPs! DoEs ThAt BoThEr YoU? iF yEs, TelL mE! JUST TALK TO ME!!!!! **


	6. Chapter 6

**SO its time for a guest author: Mizu Mitsuname. aka: teacher! YEAH! whoo. okay for those of you who havent noticed, i am a MUSTANG fan girl, and seeing as how ed is in this chapter, i thought that an EDWARD fan girl should write it. So she did saving me time so that I can post my next chapter asap....tomorow probably, but ya never know with me. Anyway where was i.....oh right, Mizu! Say hello Mizu! Mizu: uh, hello? what the heck is this? another one of your really peppy authors notes before we crush the hopes and dreams of fans everywhere?! Theaterinspired: uh.....yes. anyway, enough stalling, i am sure you want to read this chapter more than you want to hear me rant about not getting reveiws (those wouldnt need to exist if you would REVEIW FOR ONCE!) so here is the next chapter.**

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Edward and Alphonse walked into Mustang's office. It was late at night, and everyone had gone home, except the Colonel. He was once again at the office working into the night. Mustang played it off as "staying late to do paperwork," but everyone knew that there was something else. When he had received the call from Havoc, he knew there was something wrong. Ed has his suspicions that the Colonel was up to something. He had to stop the planning in its tracks. Ed had made that mistake before and he was not going to let anyone else follow in his footsteps.

There was no one in the office, not even Mustang. That confirmed it. He was not up doing paperwork, but working on something else entirely. Ed knew how alchemists thought. Human transmutation was something alchemists supposedly did as a last resort, but Ed knew better. Every time he had had an experience with the concept it was done without a moment's hesitation. Mustang would be no different. Ed could hear footsteps coming down the hall. He turned and asked Al to leave the room. He would rather not let his younger brother hear what he was going to say.

The Colonel walked into his office and was greeted by the angry stare of the Fullmetal Alchemist. The first thing Ed said was,

"Don't even consider it."

As Al left the room to wait in the hallway, Mustang looked into the bright yellow eyes of the Fullmetal Alchemist. Obviously, Edward was not an idiot. Of all the people he knew, he expected the kid to be the first to figure it out. It was all a matter of time. He just really wished that Ed could keep his mouth shut. He knew Fullmetal well enough to know that that was not going to happen.

"Mustang, listen to me," Ed had an angry tone in his voice but a pleading look in his eyes. "You don't even want to consider it. In the long run, all you will do is get yourself and others even more hurt. Human transmutation is not the answer to your problems."

"Well aren't we feeling hypocritical today," Mustang gave Ed an angry glare. "Look, Fullmetal, it is not your place to tell others what to do, especially in this case. You make a fool of yourself by just mentioning it. Plus, you have no say in the matters of anyone else's life, no matter what you think."

"Honestly, it's not your life I am worried about, it's hers! Do you really want to kill her twice? Do you really want to put her through that again? Would you be willing to have her life on your hands twice? You sent her into the tower where she died the first time, would you be able to send her through the gate again?" Edward was angry. Mustang needed to listen. Ed would not let anyone else commit his sin. As much as he hated Mustang, he did not hate him enough to let him feel the pain of committing the greatest taboo.

Mustang looked at his papers and back toward Ed, "I have found a way to make it work. I can do this. I can make the equivalent exchange. I will bring her back."

"You can't make an equivalent exchange!" Ed was getting frustrated. "Yes, alchemy's greatest law is equivalent exchange, but you have no way to know the price you must pay. The price for a life is infinitely greater than human beings could ever pay. Even the Philosopher's Stone is not an option. Trust me, Mustang. I learned that the hard way. The dead should remain dead. Do not interrupt the flow!"

"As I said, you sound like a damned fool. There is always a way to make an equivalent exchange. Did you so soon forget about your brother? Infinity is merely a concept because simple minds don't have a number that goes that far. With alchemy, nothing is impossible. I can do it. I will do it. I will bring back the Lieutenant."

"You are the reason alchemists get a bad name. 'Alchemists be for the people' that's our motto. But you can't be for the people if you think of nothing but your own problems."

"I am being for the people. I am fixing something I messed up. I am not doing this for myself. It's for her."

"Can you honestly say that?"

There was silence for a time while both alchemists contemplated Fullmetal's words. Ed realized the Mustang was far beyond hope. Ed knew what it was like to fill oneself with hope and crush it in one night. All these hours and hours of tedious study were crushed to nothing in one moment. Ed knew it would be the same for Mustang. But, he couldn't let it be.

"Colonel, it is not possible to bring someone back from the dead. Don't even try. Leave the power over life and death out of the hands of fickle humans. Stop treading in God's domain. " He paused for a moment. "There is nothing you can give to bring her back. I know. I've tried. Please, don't make my mistake. All it can do is bring more pain. Do you think I enjoy blaming myself for the way Alphonse is? Do you think I enjoy being a dog of the military? What do you think the Lieutenant would say to these plans and ideas?" Ed motioned to the papers that were lying on the desk.

"DO NOT BRING HER INTO THIS!"

"SHE'S ALREADY IN THIS! SHE IS YOUR VICTIM! YOU ALREADY BROUGHT HER INTO THIS MESS!"

"It was my responsibility to keep her safe. I failed. I sent her to her death. That means that I have to bring her back. I will do it, Ed. I will succeed where you failed. I will bring the Lieutenant back. She will once again walk on this earth. Nothing you say can stop me!"

"I know exactly what the Lieutenant would say to you. She would tell you to stop worrying about her and worry about yourself. She would tell you to think about becoming the Fuhrer. That's the reason she died, Mustang, to help you reach the top. She gave her life for you and if you try human transmutation you shrug her life off as nothing. If you do this the Lieutenant died in vain!"

"THE LIEUTENANT DIED BECAUSE OF MY MISTAKE! SHE DIED AND NOW IT IS MY DUTY TO BRING HER BACK!"

"IT IS NOT POSSIBLE TO BRING THE DEAD BACK TO LIFE!" Ed yelled at Mustang. Then he became quiet. "It just isn't."

Mustang turned around to face the window. This argument was going nowhere. Nothing could change his mind now. He wouldn't let it happen.

"If you are finished," Mustang said, "then leave. I have work to do and I don't need a kid telling me how to run my life."

Ed looked at Mustang. This man was past reason. He couldn't even mention her name. He hadn't used flame alchemy in weeks. Roy Mustang was a lost cause. Ed dropped his head with a sad look crossing his face. Then he stood up. Ed stormed out of the office and slammed the door behind him.

Mustang heard the clank of metal going down the hall. When the sound faded into the distance, he stood up, opened his desk, and took out the papers. He put on his coat and walked out of the office door. It was raining yet again, but by now this didn't bother him. He walked out into the cool night air and lifted his face to feel the water pelt against it. He had no time left. People were becoming aware. It was now or nothing.

The Flame Alchemist walked home that night, giving himself time to think things over. He already had all the materials he needed. He would have to take them into his basement, but the circle was already there since that was where he practiced. The only thing left was the resolve to do something. His conversation with Fullmetal had given him that.

Roy unlocked his door and went into his bedroom. Retrieving the materials – water, lime, sulfur, phosphorus, and so on – he went down to the basement. On the floor was drawn a large circle. Mustang chuckled to himself. Ironically enough this was probably the same circle Ed used when he transmuted his mother.

The materials were placed in the center of the circle. Mustang knelt down and took off his gloves. He looked at the pile of what looked like dirt in the middle of the room. Soon, he would see her again.

Right as he went to activate the alchemy, there was a crash upstairs. "WHERE IS HE?!?!" He heard a slightly high-pitched but muffled voice yell. Mustang heard the clanking of metal on his tile floor. He could follow the sound of the footsteps across the ceiling.

"I don't know, brother." The voice was that of Alphonse Elric, there was no mistaking its metallic ring.

"Damn," Ed let out a few more choice curses. "Stay here while I check the basement, ok?"

Before an answer came, Ed was running down the stairs. For some reason or another, alchemists were incredibly predictable creatures. One would only commit the greatest taboo in a dark, secret place. It was the nature of the mindset of the alchemist, and the nature of the beast itself. Edward knew Mustang would be in his basement.

Mustang also swore. Ed had probably followed him here, picking up the feeling that he was ready. Mustang hadn't noticed the mood change, but Ed had. The Colonel seemed too much like he was before Hawkeye died. Ed was not going to give up that easily.

Fullmetal got to the bottom of the stairs and kicked open the door. He saw Mustang kneeling on the ground next to a large transmutation circle. Mustang jumped when the door opened. He turned to face Edward's seething glare.

Ed walked up to Mustang and grabbed him by his shirt collar. "You bastard, damn you. Can't you see yourself? You are a mess. You are in your basement, ready to try something that shouldn't be done."

Mustang returned Ed's look with one of his own. He grabbed Ed's arm. "You can't stop me," he said as he locked eyes with Edward. In his eyes, Ed saw hope and despair, enlightenment and darkness, all in one.

Edward realized he had made a mistake. He had grabbed Mustang with his normal arm. Mustang latched onto Ed's wrist and twisted until Ed had to let go. Mustang turned to the circle and slapped its edge a hard as he could.

The light flashed and started swirling in a huge mass around the edge of the circle. Second by second the energy was getting closer and closer to the center. Ed knew he only had so much time to stop the transmutation – or at least interrupt it. He clapped his hands together with a smack and reached out to force his own alchemic power into the reaction.

Before he could make any contact, a black spear shot through his automail and pinned him to the ground. He was stuck. Ed was useless. He could do nothing.

Ed watched as the yellow light turned to an angry purple and Mustang disappeared from view.

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**Review! please for me and Mizu! especially if you want see if hawkeye comes back, or what happens next!**


	7. Chapter 7

**And because I am soo amazing I, theaterinspired is back with another peppy intro to another chapter. and if the last one made you worry, dont panic, this one will do so too if not more so! Oh and I am sure that Mizu is greatful for all of your fab. reveiws. Mizu: hey, stop putting words in my mouth! theaterinspired: well thats what you get for letting ME be the ones to post them! besides, you say these intros are too peppy and raise their hopes and dreams. anyway, i want to post two challenges for those that like those. One is see if you can identify what book i was reading for school when i wrote this chapter! second, did you know what the dates and info in Mustang's date book actually translated into? Oh yeah, REVEIW! tell me what you think of.... well read and then tell me what you think about the events that transpired. :D**

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Mustang stood, disoriented for the moment. What had happened? He looked up and balanced himself. He looked at himself and laughed, nothing seemed wrong.

"What's the matter, Al-chem-ist?" Roy Mustang looked in front of him. There was a sketchy outline of a human that was sitting on the floor. The voice was unique, almost as if it wasn't one voice, but the voices of millions all talking at once. It was oddly intriguing to the Flame Alchemist.

"Nothing," Mustang said, realizing that whoever, or whatever, he was talking to was waiting for a reply. "Who are you?" he asked warily.

The mouth on the outline of the body twisted into a sinister smile, "I always enjoy when people ask that question. Call me whatever you like. I am the world, also known as the universe, god, true knowledge, all, one, and even… you."

Mustang laughed, "Perfect."

"Perfect you say? What makes this perfect?"

"I wanted to talk with you," Mustang said, "I want to see what it takes to make the exchange. You see…"

"You don't need to tell me," the Being said in an exasperated tone, "I know, you want to bring Riza Hawkeye back to the other side of the gate, back to earth. The question is what are you willing to give?" the Being said.

"I'll give you…" Mustang thought for a moment. He had been doubtful that he would even make it this far but he was sure that he would get what he wanted, no matter the cost to him. "I'll give you everything and anything!"

"Are you sure? Humans have very little understanding of such things as everything and anything. Here, I will show you what everything actually is…" Mustang felt a tugging pulling him backward. He looked over his shoulder and saw black tentacles, if you could call them that, dragging him back to a beautifully carved stone gate. He didn't fight it, the truth was that he was too tired and he was willing to accept any fates that awaited him. Just as the doors closed, he heard the Being say, "I hope you are a good learner, Mr. Alchemist."

The sensation of being pulled never left the Flame Alchemist as he traveled through the inside of the gate. What almost seemed like video reels floated at a rapid pace past him, barely allowing enough time for his mind to fully process what he was seeing. His mind felt heavy and ready to explode if he didn't get a moment's rest from the information.

Just before he thought he understood it all, he felt a push as he was flung back through the gate in front of the Being. "and that, my dear friend, is what everything looks like."

Roy looked at his hands, "I get it, the reason why the other people who have attempted transmutation have failed because they never understood. Humans have no idea what the real meanings behind our words mean. We should never say words like 'everything', 'anything', or even 'nothing'. We also have no idea what our actions equal, that's why equivalent exchange is hard to judge in our everyday actions."

"So what would be equal for the exchange so that you can earn back your Lieutenant?" the Being asked.

Mustang looked at the Being in contemplation. He had to treat this like a chess game; he had to think a few steps in front of the worthy opponent. His major issue was that anything he would say could be twisted to suit the Being's agenda. "What do you suggest?"

The Being tilted it's head, "Why are you asking me?"

"It makes sense. Tell me what I should give and from there I will try to haggle until we are both pleased," Mustang said as he sat cross legged on the floor.

"Well," the Being started after a moment, "I would say you want her mind, body and soul, correct?"

Mustang nodded, "Well, technically I want her to have…" He stopped. Even if he attempted to clarify, it could mess things up. If he said he wanted her to have her body back that would make her into ash. "I want her to have a living working human body that looks like she did before I sent her into the building where she died."

"Oh," the Being said surprised, "I see you are trying to cover your loopholes, very good. That will save us time later. So what can you give for the body?.... Seeing as how you used the Philosopher's Stone, I will allow for one free item. But that would only get you the body, there would be no guarantee as to how long she would be able to stay connected to the body. Let's come back to the body, maybe that can come without a personal price.

"Do you actually have an answer to any of this yourself," Mustang asked obviously annoyed.

"No," the Being replied, "That's why I wanted your answer. Normally I say no to people when it takes them this long."

Mustang thought. He was running out of time, "A life for a life seems equal."

"Yes, so it would seem," the Being said sadly. "But there needs to be more. You and the Lieutenant had quite a… history!" it exclaimed. "That would gain you something else. But what would you give, seeing as how you have seen my gate and therefore will not need a circle when you go back."

"I don't mind the circles, they let me actually control everything to an exact point" Mustang muttered to himself before he covered his mouth, realizing that he had spoken out loud.

"So that's another thing you can give. But what about something else…" the Being stopped talking and a smile crept slowly over its mouth.

"What are you thinking?" Mustang questioned. He didn't like how the Being seemed to be making up its own mind without saying a word to him.

"I know how I can get you back your beloved Lieutenant, but it comes at high costs. If you agree there will be a lot of emotional turmoil," the Being warned.

"I don't care," Mustang said, "I have given too much to go back without what I came for. Just do it!"

"So be it," the Being said. "Let me fill you in on some basics of what I am doing. You will get everything that you wanted. She will be back in body mind and soul."

"What do you get?"

The smile on the Being's face grew, if that were at all possible, "What I receive is complicated and not a must know for you. Here is what you will want to know. First of all, I can guarantee that you will not become Fuhrer, so you might as well stop trying. Second of all," the Being paused and Mustang suddenly felt a wave of exhaustion crush over top of him. He doubled over trying to keep his body upright. "Your life span has decreased dramatically now."

Mustang looked up at the Being, a look of hatred filling his eyes. "Oh, look," the Being said as if amused, "Your fire has come back inside of you. Wonderful."

"How long do I have?" Mustang asked slowly sitting up again.

"Maybe a month, more or less. I can't tell you exactly, that would be unfair to everyone else in the universe. Another thing that you will lose is your memory of the gate. You will remember talking with me, and what you have yet to do here, but you won't remember inside the Gate. Basically, you will still need your precious circles."

"Fine," Mustang said standing up, "Is that all that will occur?"

"Not quite, I have something that I am taking from your Subordinate, but I am sure that that won't concern you," the Being jibed.

"What are you going to do to her?" Mustang questioned suspiciously.

"You and Riza Hawkeye have quite a history together, don't you? Some even say that it's a love story. A love story about two hearts that are not able to admit their admiration of the other because, to put it in words I have heard, because they are "too damn professional". I am correct in saying that only the two of you are the only ones who knows where exactly you two started?"

Mustang's mouth went dry. This exchange was too much as soon as Hawkeye had been pulled into the giving end of the exchange. He wanted to scream in protest. He wanted to take it all back. He would rather just die in her place, but he couldn't. The Being had made up its mind.

"She won't remember it," The Being said harshly. "All that she will know is that you are her superior officer and all of those pretty little details. She will remember the apprentice ship, and the war, and her job. But she won't know that she is solely responsible for you learning the secrets of Flame Alchemy. She will be under the impression that you learned it all from her father. She won't remember how she has helped with that part of your life. Any emotions attached to you will be gone as if they had never existed. "

The Being was obviously enjoying the effect this news was having on the Colonel. The Flame Alchemist sunk to his knees, his head staring at the floor so that his hair covered his face. The Being loved this, the Colonel looked even more miserable than when he had watched the building collapse.

"But I will give you something, to help with the hard time you have left, however short that now is," The Being said. "I hate it when people do this, but it's the easiest way to describe the concept to mere humans. People give roses as a sign of hope. I will give you a moment with your rose, so that you can talk to her before I send you back through, making the effects of this deal occur."

Mustang watched as the Being stood and went to the Gate that remained closed behind Mustang. Roy didn't turn around, he just listened, but he kept facing forward. He could hear the Gate opening freely at the approach of the Being. It stepped inside, and the Gate shut.

"Wait, where are you going?" Mustang asked.

"He will be back, sir," a familiar voice said from behind. Mustang's eyes grew wide. "He just wanted give us a chance to talk before everything changes."

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**hehehe.... and people think im a nice person. and to think that these are people i actaully like! moooowahaha! (for those of you who didnt figure it out, the Being is the Truth). Oh, and here is a code for ya! REVEIW if you cried when our transmutation cicle failed. actually, just everyone reveiw and tell me exactly what you think of me. do you hate me for what I did to them? if not wait, you will. :D **


	8. Chapter 8

**Ta-da! A chapter that is actually on time for once this story! Yeah! I am celebrating like no other. Not just because of this chapter, but because of this week in which nothing will really get done in my life at all. To be honest, idk if there will be an on time chapter next week seeing as how i have an essay due tomorow, auditions on wensday, dance comittee also on wensday, and convention this weekend (so pray for good weather so i can get there). Which means that i wont have the time to write on the weekend, except maybe in the car as long as all of my homework is done, which will be the focus this week. So as a gift in case i dont post, this is a happy chapter. (sorta). Thanks to my two helpers, Mizu and Masta, you get the fun of this chapter, in which i do a bunch of things i had been wanting to since the begining (I was afterschool for three hours, because i needed a ride and Mizu and Masta had play practice, so i got time to write). Oh, and since those two wanted me to change the catapult to a cannon, i did, becuase i think deep down that bothered me too. but anyway, here ya go! and please remember, GIVE ME A REVIEW! more than two this chapter please! thanks**

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Mustang stood and turned slowly. Riza Hawkeye's bright hazel eyes met his. She looked like she had when he had last seen her in the battle. She wore her military issue pants and boots with her black turtle neck and her blond hair flipped up out of her way. He smiled at the sight of her again, "Lieutenant, are you okay?"

She slapped him, hard. "Are you dense sir? You just agreed to the one thing forbidden from Alchemists, and your biggest concern is where I am okay?"

He looked at her, the determination in his eyes coming back at the sight of her, "It was my decision."

"Yes," she yelled, "but it affects more than just you! You've brought a lot of innocent people, who only wanted to help you, into this mess!"

"I tried to keep them, _everyone_, out of this," he retorted.

"But surely you realized that I would be put into this. You weren't _that_ stupid were you?"

"What happened to you was my fault. I…"

Riza hit him again, "Please don't tell me that you still blame yourself for what happened to me. _I _made the decision that ended _my_ life."

****FLASHBACK****

Hawkeye followed the Colonel, flanking him on his right, out of the tent. They were in a war zone, and she knew it. Something had her on edge, though exactly what was a mystery. It couldn't just be that they were at war; she had grown used to that feeling. She focused on her job, protecting the Flame Alchemist by watching his back.

Once they reached halfway through the camp they stopped. She watched her superior look around and she knew what he was looking for. He wanted to give her a good vantage point to help give them cover as the rest of them infiltrated the enemy lines. It was what was best for her talents, but she really didn't want to have to be separated from the others.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye," Roy Mustang said after a moment. He nodded towards one of the only remaining buildings left in the small town that they were outside of, "Go up there and give us cover."

Hawkeye looked back at him, "Sir, I don't know if the building is the safest place. I am sure that the cadets up there…"

Mustang cut her off, "I never thought that you would worry about your own safety."

Her mind spun in circles. Did she follow orders and go where he told her to, or did she go with her instinct and stay close to her team? No, there was no question; she would do as he told her this time. "It's not my safety, sir" she told him, "I just am thinking about…" she let the thought drop. It didn't matter anyway.

"Go," Mustang said smiling at her, "That's an order." She didn't argue with him. She clicked her heels together and saluted, "Best of luck to you in battle sir."

He saluted her back, "Don't worry, this battle is just wrapping up. Just do me a favor and don't get hurt, and I will do the same." He turned away from her, "And don't forget to watch my back while I try and get close." She watched him walk away, leading Falman, Fuery, Breda and Havoc to the battle.

Hawkeye turned away and sprinted towards the building. She made it to the building and ran up the stairs, passing many young cadets who had stopped to salute her.

Without a word to anyone she set up her position at the top most window. The younger cadets were too afraid to even think about trying to hit anything from up there, but she knew better. As long as you compensated the height when lining up your trajectory, you would hit clear without any problem.

It took her a moment to find the Flame Alchemist. He was still standing on their side of the battle and for that she was grateful. She had hoped that he would wait for her to get into position so that she could help. She lined up and shot one enemy soldier that had recklessly attempted to cross the middle ground. This shot was the signal; Mustang could now tell that she was in position.

For what seemed like too long she sent shot after shot stopping anyone before they could get in the Colonel's way. This should be nerve wracking, but she was calm for some reason. She could tell that the rest of her team was starting to become tired of the continuous struggle for survival in the war.

After a little while longer and good handfuls of successful kills, she watched along the enemy lines. Suddenly shouts from the cadets in the building erupted.

"Lieutenant," one cadet called running up the stairs. Hawkeye fired another shot and kept her eyes on the field, on Mustang.

"Sir, there's an issue," the cadet said urgently. "The enemy is moving what seems to be a cannon."

Hawkeye fired another shot before she took a second to spot what the cadet was talking about. A cannon had been brought towards the front lines of the enemy army. "Lieutenant," the cadet begged, "They have this building in the trajectory path. We need to evacuate!"

Hawkeye located the Colonel and team again, "Then evacuate," she told the cadet. She sighed, her mind moving on to other things. The Colonel's destructive flames had attracted the attention of the enemy and her team was in trouble.

"But sir," the cadet pleaded.

Hawkeye kept her focus on the field when she addressed the subordinate, "You need to leave so you can continue to fight another time."

The cadet was exasperated at the woman, "Lieutenant…"

"If you are going to keep saying that then treat me as your superior," Lieutenant Hawkeye snapped, "Go, that's an order!" She listened as the footsteps of the young cadet faded. Riza didn't stop firing at the enemy, she couldn't. She had to protect Mustang; that was her job.

She was aware of the bomb now being loaded into the cannon, but she was even more aware of her team in need.

She watched as a man on the other line pointed urgently. Even though she couldn't hear him, she could tell the general message. The man was telling another soldier to attack the Flame Alchemist.

She hesitated as time seemed to slow to her. She could leave the building to insure her own safety and pray that Havoc would take over and save Mustang. The other option was to stay put and take control of the situation, knowing that she would not live. But if Mustang died, it wouldn't make any difference, she would die too. And if she died and he lived, it wouldn't matter. He would survive, and his survival meant that he could meet his goals. If he being able to meet his goal meant the end of her, so be it. There really was never a decision, she would save him.

Riza Hawkeye lined up her scope precisely with the assailant. She closed her eyes and pulled the trigger causing the man to drop dead before he could harm the Alchemist. As she felt the trigger release, she heard the whizzing of the cannon firing. The building shook violently upon the impact of the bomb. She knew she was out of time.

Hawkeye put the gun on the floor. She stood and took a step back so that she could still see out the window but no one could see her from the ground. Flames started to cover her surroundings. She looked out the window and flinched. Mustang was sprinting back towards the building at a dead run.

The building creaked, it was ready to collapse. A single tear fell from Riza's eye. "Sorry Roy," she whispered. Just then the sensation of falling filled her body and everything disappeared in a blinding light.

****END FLASH BACK****

Hawkeye looked away from the Colonel. She clenched her fist tightly. "I went because…. it was my job. Please sir," she begged desperately, "Stop blaming yourself."

"No," he argued, "It was my job. 'Protect your subordinates,' is one thing I try to uphold. I didn't protect you." He laughed sadly after a moment, "Look at us Hawkeye. Are we really using these precious moments to argue whose fault this situation is?"

This made her smile, "You're right," she said turning back to face him, "In the end it doesn't matter. You're an idiot for trying human transmutation."

He smiled too, "And you're an idiot for not running when you had the chance." A silence fell between the two. Mustang's mind was spinning with memories and thoughts. He wanted to tell her everything while it would mean something. "Are you aware of what's happening to make the exchange?" he asked softly.

Hawkeye sighed, "Only that I will lose most memory of what we've been though together." Mustang nodded to himself. That's all she needed to know about the exchange. "Will you be okay?" she asked interrupting his thoughts.

"Yes, I will be. I just wish…" he stopped himself.

She looked away, "What are we going to do, sir?"

"We are going to keep going on the road we're on, no matter how long it is. We don't have a choice." Hawkeye's eyes widened at his words. He grabbed her hand gently and held it. "What are you thinking?" he asked.

"I'm just thinking about what memories I'm losing. I won't remember most of my childhood I guess."

She was sad, Mustang could tell. But this was the reality in front of them. He couldn't change it now even if he wanted to. "No," he corrected her after some thought, "You just won't remember after I showed up. Then again, you will remember me being there. Things would probably start changing after your father's death."

"No," Hawkeye thought, "It would be after I first met you."

Mustang was confused, "Why? The Being said that you would know of my apprenticeship with your father."

"Yes, but that was the first time that I…" she stopped, blushing. Riza looked down, "Sir, why are you holding my hand?"

"Oh," he said sheepishly, though he didn't let go. "Sorry."

"Don't be, I like it," Hawkeye admitted looking at him, "It's calming. It reminds me that…I'm not alone in all of this."

"Hey," The Being's voice echoed through the room, coming from everywhere at once. "You've got a minute left. You might want to hurry it up. The tea party's over when I come back."

Terror pushed its way into Hawkeye's eyes. Mustang hated to see her like this; he wanted to help her. He pulled her close, to him and wrapped his arms around her protectively. This felt right; he could've stayed there holding her forever. He knew it was real then, what he had wanted to tell her. He needed to tell her then so that she would know, even if for a minute, what he had wanted to say for a long time.

"Riza," he called her by name, "Can I tell you something before I lose the chance forever?"

She nodded, locking her arms around his. He pulled her as close to him as he could. She turned to face him. He looked at her and sighed, she was beautiful, just as she always had been.

He kissed her. At first she seemed surprised, but then she let him. He pulled away after a few seconds, "Riza, you mean the world to me. I know you're mad about me using Alchemy to bring you back, but I couldn't last without you. I wanted to have the chance to let you know. I'm sorry, but I love you."

This time, she kissed him. They stood there, kissing without either one showing signs of wanting to stop. This was everything; their world, their forever, their hope.

The Gate started to creek open. Hawkeye reluctantly pulled herself away and looked Mustang in the eyes. "Don't be sorry," she said. "I love you too."

* * *

**Now that was fun wasnt it? She hit him twice and they kissed twice. And they all lived happily ever after..... WRONG!!! its not over. they still have edward to deal with.  
And no one answered my questions from last time! I was reading Scarlet Letter, (well...."reading"). common! the Rose was a dead give away! Ugh....! Anyway! reveiw  
**

**Really want to hear from you  
Even if its just two words  
Very nice to get input  
Everyone can do it  
Its not too much to ask  
When will you get the message?  
**

I Just want a REVEIW!


	9. Chapter 9

**TADA! now tell me how amazing i am at that last chapter! I know, im horrible. to write something like that and then interupt it now... oh well. Sorry this chapter is late. I had Ohayocon (the group walking around with alphonse, winry, lust, sloth (anime), ed and then me) anyway, i was distracted majorly. and yes this dosnt have any thing really new with a sign attached, but some things that i have hidden in it for later. So here ya go! btw. i am throwing away the set schedule of posting on mondays, because then this will take forever and i have other parts of the story i want to write asap. so i will post at least once a week, other then that, its all pretty much random. Thanks and enjoy!**

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Edward looked around the room and swore. He couldn't believe that he had let the Colonel actually try with the certainty of failure.

"Well, Fullmetal, you almost ruined everything. It's a good thing I made it in time." Edward struggled to face the direction the voice had come from. The spear was determined to keep him immobile at any cost, which made it hard to move. Lust moved from out of the shadows, a taunting smile across her face.

"What are you doing here?" Ed asked.

"I came to make sure that everything goes as it should. We couldnt have idiots like you ruin the flow," she said lucidly.

"What flow?"

"The flow of human grief, the flow of energy, the flow of plans," Lust explained as she came closer to him.

"Why would you help him?" Edward questioned, glaring profoundly at her. "He can only fail. Why are you feeding him false hope?"

Lust glanced away, "It might not be as hopeless as you think. He does have a philosopher's stone after all."

The golden eyes of the Fullmetal Alchemist grew, "How…"

It was obvious that Lust was enjoying herself at the kid's reaction. She shrugged, "I gave it to him."

Just then a blinding flash of light burst from the center of the transmutation circle, radiating outward. Lust flicked her wrist, retracting the spear that had been in Ed's automail. She took a step back in shock.

Mustang stood, seemingly whole in the middle of the circle. The only thing was that was different was that his breathing was heavy. Mustang's eyes were staring down at his feet. Edward inwardly gasped when he saw what the man was watching. On the ground laid what appeared to be the body of First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye.

Edward pulled himself to his feet. "Stay back," Lust warned, putting her arm out to stop him. Her eyes were wide and she kept her sight on the Colonel.

Then, something Edward thought he would never see happened. The body moved. It was breathing.

Mustang collapsed to his knees, his hair covering his face. "I did it," he whispered to himself. Even though he had made the exchange, he had had his doubts that it would work. The Being could have been even more of a bastard and made it all not worth anything.

Edward pushed his way past Lust and approached the Flame Alchemist, "Mustang, are you okay?"

Mustang laughed, "Yeah, you could say that." Ed watched the man cautiously. This didn't add up. A successful transmutation was unrealistic, especially if Mustang didn't lose anything. After all, Ed and Al had lost much when they tried and failed. What did he do in order to succeed?

After a moment, the Colonel slowly rose. He walked around Hawkeye's unconscious body, trying to find a way to get her out of his basement. "Edward, I need to get her back to her apartment."

Ed crossed his arms stubbornly, "Not until I get some answers."

"Listen," Lust argued her eyes still in shock, "We don't have time for that. If she wakes up we will have a lot of explaining to do that will make this even more complicated."

"You're right," Ed agreed after some thought. Mustang tried to pick her up, but couldn't lift her; he was too weak from the time he spent in the Gate. Ed had an idea and called up the stairs, "Hey, Al, can you give us a hand?"

The thundering of Alphonse echoed as he descended the stairs. He looked at his older brother blankly. "Can you help us move her back to her apartment Al?" Ed asked quietly.

"I'll explain later," Mustang promised. Alphonse went over and carefully picked up the Lieutenant and walked up the stairs.

Roy stared after them for a moment before he got up, "Come on," he said as he passed Ed.

Edward didn't follow, "You know that she is still here, right?" he asked pointing at Lust.

Mustang stopped, "What's your point, Fullmetal? She can do whatever the hell she wants." He turned to face her, "Thank you for everything. I owe you."

"No," Lust said, finally snapping back to reality. She flipped her hair as she passed the Flame Alchemist and headed up the stairs, "You don't owe me anything. You've paid the price already."

Roy Mustang sprinted up the stairs with Edward closely behind. "How are we going to do this?" Ed asked.

"We'll walk. It isn't too far to her apartment," Mustang answered as he headed out the door while grabbing his jacket.

"But she's been… dead for a long time. Wouldn't they have cleaned out her apartment by now?"

"Trust me," Mustang said as they headed down the street. "No one has touched her apartment. It's just like her desk in the office. Because she has no family to be heard of, the job falls to the military. They decided that it would fall to my team to take care of that. And I wasn't about to order the others to do it. None of us wanted to go though her things, so they are just as they were."

When they reached the room, Mustang opened the door using the spare key that was hidden above the door frame. He had to smile; he remembered arguing with her about where to put it. He had walked her back one day when the car had broken down and watched her open the door using it. He had argued that it was an obvious place and that someone would look there first. They argued with each other for a good while. Eventually he did side with her; she could take care of herself. But she had given him the key saying that if he cared so much he could place it somewhere better. So just to spite her, he walked over and put it on the door. He sighed, would she remember that? No, she wouldn't, he knew that.

Mustang lead them in. He took a deep breath, this was hard. The room was clean except for the few spare articles of clothing that had been carelessly thrown around the room. It was obvious that she had left in a hurry for the war. Her bookshelf was as full as it could be. One book was open on her desk, the page blank.

Alphonse clanked over to the bed and gingerly laid her down. Mustang picked up the clothes on the floor and placed them in the open drawer. He looked around and sighed. He didn't want to leave, but he had to. In all honesty, he wished he was still standing in the gate with her, but that wasn't reality anymore. He wanted everything to be okay, and it would be, just not yet. Mustang turned around and left the room without a word to either of the Elric brothers. He wanted to get out of there before he lost it.

He could hear the brothers following behind him. He focused on the sidewalk, keeping his head down as he walked through the city. He noticed the spare key that was still in his hand. He put it in his pocket, he could return it later, she wouldn't notice.

Roy Mustang froze as something came over him. The world spun quickly around him, the colors and shapes blending into each other. _Damn it, I didn't realize that something like this would start already. _He held his head in his hands, trying to stop the unsettling sensation_._

"Mustang," Ed asked, eyeing the man cautiously. "What's wrong?"

The feeling stopped as fast as it had started. Mustang started down the street again, "Nothing, it's nothing."

They went back to the Colonel's home. Mustang closed the door once they were all inside and locked it. It was bad enough that he had to tell the kids everything already; he didn't want unwanted ears to hear them. "What do you want to know?" he asked without turning around.

Alphonse looked to his older brother who just stared at the floor. "What happened… in the Gate?"

Mustang walked over to a chair and sat down. He didn't look at Ed, he couldn't. Ed could tell that the man was understandably distracted. Mustang finally spoke, "The..Being in the Gate was there."

Edward nodded, "The Truth."

"Yeah, him," Mustang mumbled. "He told me that there was a high price to be successful in the transmutation."

Ed glanced at his hands folded in his lap, "what did you give?"

Mustang ignored him. The Flame Alchemist walked over towards the window and stopped to pet Black Hayate.

Ed stood, "Damn it, what did you give to bring Hawkeye back?"  
"Calm down, I will tell you when and if I want to," Mustang barked back. He sighed, he needed to tell them. It would be better if they heard it from him now. As much as he wanted to protect the brothers, they needed to know what was real. "She's lost most of her memories of me. I guess that that is the easiest way to explain it… well," he added after the thought, "It's not that simple. The sense of loyalty and trust will be gone."

"That's…. interesting. Why? That was taking from not you. How was that an equivalent exchange?" Ed asked turning to Alphonse who was watching the Flame Alchemist.

"I won't pretend to understand it, Fullmetal. I just accept the fact and keep going," Roy replied.

"Says the man that couldn't go on without her," Edward muttered to himself.

"Colonel," Alphonse said sternly, "You're not telling us everything. What else did you give?"

"I shouldn't tell you two everything. Call me a hypocrite, but I won't be responsible for feeding you ideas so that you can try and bring back your mother. I risked everything, but you don't need to."

"This isn't about that at all, Alphonse said while he stood up, "I want to know what we are facing; what we might need to give to get our bodies back or how things are going to affect us."

Mustang turned, "As long as you aren't going to lecture me about what this means and how stupid you think I am, because I have already been chewed out for that…"

"What did you do?"

Mustang closed his eyes, "I won't live much longer."

Edward's eyes grew, "How long exactly do you have?"  
"Maybe a month, I'm not sure what will exactly happen," Roy explained. "I don't think I will see another four months, but I have no way to know any of that."

"Why?!?! Why did you agree to that?" Alphonse said, his voice shaking.

A smile spread across the Flame Alchemist's face. His eyes shifted to the right, "Let's just say that I have my reasons."

"But what about your goals? How are you going to reach them?" Edward asked solemnly.

"I won't," Mustang responded. "It's that simple."

"How do you know that you won't? You are really okay with just giving up? You're just going to say that's that and not try anymore?" Ed asked, exasperated at the sudden change in attitude.

"No, I have no say in this anyway. Time will be out; I don't have time to climb much further in rank. But that's okay; I'll stay in the military until I'm gone. Whatever rank I make, at least I made it that far."

"Why? Why are you letting this happen?" Alphonse asked.

Mustang put his hand in his pocket and pulled out his glove. He walked over to the fire place and snapped, creating a small enough spark to create a good fire with a comforting glow. "I don't have to explain my reasoning to you two. What's done is done."

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**REVEIW!!!!! before i go get my death note... but first i need to find it. i guess the most i can threaten is not posting more for a long time! mooowahaha!**


	10. Chapter 10

**TADA! tis another chapter for the pretty people. i was looking at my reader trafic and couldnt help but laugh at the fact that chapter 8 when they are inside the gate has the most veiws, even though i have updated since then. that makes me laugh. yes i was an "awwwww" chapter, but i keep writting so that i can get to the next one, which will be diabolical and beautiful when i get there. the nice thing is that after this we will only have another chapter or two of this type before things get super interesting again. anyway... ya want to know what happens next? well here ya go! ps: howdya like them appples of chapter 104? :P**

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The young secretary knocked hesitantly on the wooden door in front of her. She hated this part of her new job, telling the man in charge of the country things that no one else wanted to because no one knew how he would respond.

"Come in," the Fuhrer's voice said from inside. She took a deep breath and stepped in, closing the door behind her.

"King Bradley, sir," she started, "I have a message here concerning Colonel Mustang." Bradley turned towards the window, "What is it?"

"He… succeeded in human transmutation," the secretary reported in a rush.

"And why did this come to my attention?" the Fuhrer asked after a moment.

"It's just that no one has ever been successful in bringing the dead back to life. The investigation team has looked into it and wanted to see if you had something specific in mind before they put this case on trial."

Bradley smiled, "Let's put him on trial, but let's just scold him, that's all we can really do. We won't fire him; if he can do something of that magnitude then he may prove to be a powerful ally. And we don't want to kill his work or anything, he could just repeat it. Who did he resurrect by the way?"

The secretary flipped through the papers on her clip board quickly. Even though the man was her boss, he did seem a bit odd at times. He had a habit of having her buy him melons whenever someone was in the hospital that he was planning on visiting. "First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye." There was an awkward silence that followed.

"Tell them that I will be at the hearing. Nothing is to be decided, I will make the final decision. Is there anything else?" the man asked.

"No sir."

"Very well then, you are dismissed." The secretary hurried out of the room, she didn't need to be told twice. Bradley picked up the phone and dialed the number that he had memorized for such an occasion.

"Hello?" Lust's bored voice came over the receiver.

"I hear that everything went as planned," he replied.

"Yes, it was simple. Once I gave him the stone, things went on their own path. I've never seen a man that desperate."

Bradley laughed, "I find that hard to believe."

"So what are you going to do now? He left quite a mess for you to pick up," Lust asked.

"My part of the plan; keep people from interfering."

Lust laughed harshly, "Yeah that already had some issues. If it wasn't for me, who knows what the Elric brothers would have done. Why did you call anyway?"

"I just wanted to double check that my information was correct. You can never be too sure with these idiots running around," he explained, leaning back in his chair.

"I was there myself and witnessed it occur. It was a complete success. I guess Father was correct in the assumption that this would go as we had hoped in the Gate. Riza Hawkeye is back," she answered.

"Do I detect a hint of surprise in your voice?" Bradley teased her, "You surely didn't doubt Father's knowledge."

"No," Lust snapped, "I trusted his judgment." With that she slammed the phone down, hanging up on the nation's leader.

Fuhrer Bradley laughed at the reaction. "Well, this will be more fun than I thought."

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Mustang stood in the middle of an oval room. A single light shone brightly down on him from above. The rest of the room was pitch black, so it looked like no one else was in the room. However this was one of the military's court rooms, so the Colonel knew that there were at least a hundred people seated around the outskirts of the room. Roy stood with his shoulders squared. He couldn't show his true feelings at the moment.

He felt sick, that was the easiest explanation. He had to deal with vertigo every once in a while and he constantly had at least a headache ever since he came back. Plus it had been a week. He just would prefer not be there. He wanted to curl up in a corner and sleep.

"Colonel Roy Mustang, The Flame Alchemist," a voice echoed around the room. "We have proof that suggests you attempted human transmutation. Do you deny these accusations?"

"No," Mustang said confidently. He had done the math already. If he admitted it not only would he save time in the trial, but the results might fall more in his favor.

"So you did try one of the three things forbidden by Alchemists?" the voice asked in surprise.

"Yes. I attempted human transmutation to bring back my subordinate, Riza Hawkeye, back to life," he said.

He continued over the urgent whispers of the crowd, "I was successful in this attempt to bring her back. I am fully aware of my actions and am personally responsible for them. I am aware of the possible consequences of my actions and am ready to accept them without complaint."

As he finished talking a sharp pain came into his head, making his headache even worse. It took all of his will power not to flinch at it. He really wished that they would turn off the damn light that was shinning down on him; it didn't help him at all.

It was a moment before anyone addressed him, "What did you do in order to bring her back to life?"

Mustang avoided the urge to roll his eyes. Explaining this to everyone was getting annoying. He should've written a book so that he could just hand it over to anyone who asked. But the military didn't need to know everything; he could leave out the whole thing about his life span.

"I won't divulge that information," Roy said over the whispers that were growing louder with each word he spoke. "Take it from a person who's done it, no one should ever do it again. With all due respect, if the military was smart, it would hunt down anything that hints of the human transmutation process and destroy it beyond recognition."

"How do we know that you aren't keeping what you know a secret for yourself so that you can do it again?" someone shouted overtop of the loud bickering.

Mustang kept his composure, "Because equivalent exchange is difficult to judge, it might not work again. I don't want to spread the idea that this will be possible to do again. I was lucky that I came back with what I did. I don't have the means to do it again, so don't think that I will bring someone else back."

The room suddenly became quiet for a reason unknown to Mustang. "Colonel," Fuhrer King Bradley's voice said loud enough for the entire room to hear. "I have decided your punishment. You are to turn over all materials and information that you used in order to learn about the transmutation. If they are no longer in your possession, write the names down.

"I have talked to Lieutenant Hawkeye… I realize that she recalls nothing of the battle where she died. There is also evidence that supports the idea that she has no recollection of some major points in the Ishbalan War. I can only speculate what else she no longer remembers. You are now responsible for her. Ensure that she does nothing stupid. She will stay on your team as she has been. You will not mention the topic of this meeting to her. Is all of this understood?"

Mustang clicked his heels together and bowed, "Yes sir."

"And let's make sure that this doesn't happen again."

"Yes sir."

"You are dismissed," the Fuhrer said as a door behind the Colonel opened. Mustang did an about face and walked out of the room.

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"So…" Havoc started slowly, "She's back."

The men of team Mustang (minus Mustang himself) sat around the office relaxing. Falman and Fuery will engaged in a game of chess while Breda sat with a bag of pretzels and Havoc smoked a cigarette. Hawkeye had gone with the Colonel when he left to go to a "meeting" in which the Flame Alchemist had been requested for.

Falman moved his pawn towards Fuery's side of the board, "Remind me why none of us saw this coming?"

"Because we're idiots?" Breda suggested.

"We don't know alchemy?" Fuery asked as he moved his knight.

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking," Havoc sighed. "What do you guys think of this whole thing?"

"Is it just me or do both of them seem… different?" Breda asked taking another pretzel out of the bag.

"Well obviously. I think that bringing someone back from the dead, or being brought back, will change your outlook on life," Havoc said rolling his eyes.

"I mean more direct. She seems quieter," Breda said with his mouth full.

"I didn't even think that that was possible, but you're right," Fuery said as he moved his queen. "Check."

Havoc stretched, "What about him? He seems pretty low key as well. He hasn't wanted a lot of noise, he spends most of his free time sleeping, and we don't seem to be too busy."

"That's probably because the higher-ups don't know what to do with him. He not only tried human transmutation, but he also succeeded," Falman said as he moved his bishop so that he was no longer in check. "I think it's only a matter of time before we get sent back to battle."

"What do you mean?" Breda asked. "I thought that the Colonel finished that when he created that giant wall of fire."

"Apparently he only temporarily solved the problem. They came back with more troops and they are ready to move once they are given orders. It's only a matter of time before we start getting orders to get ourselves out there," Havoc answered.

The room grew silent except for the munching of Breda. Fuery's eyes lit up as he quickly made another move. He stood and shouted, "Checkmate!"

"How is that even possible?" Havoc asked as he came over to look at the game, "He still had his queen! Actually he had one of everything left."

Fuery smiled, "Do you see a move he can make to get out of checkmate?" They had to admit, however impossible it seemed, Fuery had won.

Just then the door creaked open making them jump. Mustang and Hawkeye walked in the room and hung up their coats without a word to anyone. Havoc quickly stamped out the remnants of the cigarette. "How did it go sir?"

Mustang turned around. Havoc didn't need an answer, it was written across the alchemist's face. Things went well, all things considered, but the Flame Alchemist really just wanted to curl up and be forgotten by the world for a little while.

"It was nothing special. It was quiet simple; some idiot had attempted to pull off something that alchemists should never do. The Fuhrer saved his hide for some reason. The idiot got off easy," Mustang said. He had been telling them things like this a lot recently. Giving them what they wanted to know without giving anything to Hawkeye to make her question things.

Mustang looked up at the clock. "I am going to make a phone call. I'll be back." With that he turned around and headed back out the door. The others watched as Hawkeye went over to her desk and pulled out a book. The others looked at Havoc who nodded.

Havoc stood, "I am just going to return a phone call."

"Who to?" Hawkeye asked without looking away from her book.

Havoc opened the door and left just as he answered, "My girl friend." He followed Mustang down the hall and around the corner. Mustang had slowed down allowing for the subordinate to catch up to him.

"I'm fine Havoc."

"No offense sir, but you aren't very convincing. But that's understandable all things considered," Havoc said. Mustang eyed him suspiciously, he hadn't told them basically anything. "Edward Elric told us," Havoc explained.

"Good, it will save time. I am sick of explaining every little detail to people," Mustang said as they continued down the hall. He put his hand in his pocket and felt the spare key in it. He had forgotten that he had put it there; he needed to put it back on her door.

"I'm worried. We all are," Havoc said after a moment. "You can't seem to focus for long recently. And you just aren't yourself. You need to take some time off; it's obvious you aren't feeling well."

Mustang smiled, "I'll be fine."

Havoc stepped in front of the Colonel stopping him, "You keep saying that, but you aren't showing any progress. And soon you won't have time to say that anymore. Please tell me what I can do."

"First of all you can get out of my way," Mustang said as he stepped around Havoc. "Otherwise just be ready to move. It sounds more and more likely that we will have to go back out towards the southern border."

Havoc closed his eyes, "Fine. Just promise me you won't quit quite yet."

Mustang gave a noncommittal wave as he walked away. Havoc shook his head. Why were all of the strongest walls falling at the same time?

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**yes, i know, boring again. but not to worry this gives alot to think about. i am one of those people that when you read you dont get why i am telling you but then at the end you go "oh so thats why you did that!" so yeah, i know. ps: reveiw or i will..... delete the story from the web! or just delete chapter 8! **

**Roy: Riza :: I: Reveiw --- get it? roy loves riza, i love reveiws? hahaha Get it? oh... just reveiw!**


	11. Chapter 11

**AND NOW, for another guest author... Masta of da House! WHOO! YEAH! she has been wanting to write a chapter and i told her she could, so hear it is. maybe this will perk her up after she read chapter 104. but then again, this isnt the feel good story of the centuary. Say hello Masta! Masta: Hello! Yeah, theaterinspired, are you going to tell me whats going to happen next?? theaterinspired: you would like that wouldnt you? you are still in the dark except for what i told you so that you could write this chapter. oh, and readers? please reveiw. for the three of us that have written something for this story. pleasepleaseplease? **

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Things had been different for Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye since she had returned from the Southern front. She didn't remember quite what it was that changed her; she actually couldn't remember much at all. Any memories she had of that battle were vague and splotchy. She blamed it on selective amnesia, the same reason she figured was why she couldn't remember most of the Ishbal War. She continued filling out paperwork quietly, trying to keep her mind away from the question that had been eating at her since she got back. She flipped through the pile. Half of the paperwork, she realized, wasn't even hers. It was addressed to her superior officer. If she remembered correctly, he had a habit of making her do most of his paperwork. She wondered why she put up with it. She sighed, and continued on, not knowing exactly why, completing the paperwork as fast and as mindlessly as she could.

She looked up briefly as she heard the sounds of footsteps reentering the office. Jean Havoc had returned from his, apparently brief, phone call. He looked disheartened.

"You got dumped, didn't you?" She said bluntly.

Havoc looked at her. It was almost as if what she said didn't register. "What?" he said "Oh, yeah. Yeah. Don't remind me."

"Sorry." She said.

"I'm clocking out." He said, as he grabbed his jacket and headed out the door.

There was something he was hiding from her. It wasn't hard to tell. She knew that Havoc didn't have a girlfriend. He'd never had a girlfriend he didn't tell everyone about. She wouldn't ask about it, she decided. If there was something that everybody thought was best kept hidden from her, they probably wouldn't tell her now.

Riza decided she would head home as well. She had no reason to linger there alone since she had finished her paperwork. Frankly, she didn't want to. There had been such a tense atmosphere about the office recently, and it seemed to be directed at her. Another thing she couldn't quite understand She made sure her work was stacked accordingly and put away before collecting her things and heading out the door. She would go straight home, she decided, as she put on her coat and left. That morning she had walked to Central from her house. It had been sunny for the first time since she had returned, and she didn't want to drive. Now, with the sun gone and the wind in her face, she wished she had taken the car.

She pulled her coat closer around her as she got to the door. Her house key was usually in her pocket, and she felt around for it, desperate to get herself out of the cold. She realized at that moment, she had left it in the car the day before. It was unlike her to forget something like that. She knew she needed it, and should have brought it to work with her. But she had been so distracted lately. Never mind, she thought. I have a spare. She ran her fingers along the top of the door. An obvious place to put it, she knew. But she wasn't really concerned about her house being broken into, since she didn't own anything that would really be worth stealing. All that mattered to her was that she had an extra key in case anything like this happened.

Riza ran her fingers across the door frame, waiting for them to touch the key that she had left there, but she reached the end of the ledge without finding anything. There was no key. She wondered where it could have gone. The lieutenant checked around the area and dug through her pockets again. She touched something, a slip of paper, and unfolded it. It read:

_Dear Elizabeth,_

_I'm sorry if I don't make it tonight. You know how work is. I apologize. I don't mind if you go to see the play without me. I just wish I could be there. I'd like to see how it all ends._

_You know those plans we were making for some time now? Things have been hectic lately, but when they calm down on the Southern Front, I promise I'll follow through with that .Hopefully that will be in the next couple weeks._

_I'll try to make it up to you if I can. I don't want to miss another date. _

_Roy_

Why she had a note from the colonel to his girlfriend was beyond her. Perhaps, it had gotten mixed up with her papers, or maybe she had taken it from him. She somehow couldn't recall anything about it. But as she decided that this letter contained nothing concerning her, the lieutenant resolved to throw it away once she got the chance.

It was getting colder now, as the night grew darker. The wind wasn't helping much either. Taking a step back, Riza took out her pistol and aimed at the lock. With one shot it fell off, and she was able to open the door. She'd be getting complaints, that was certain, but she didn't worry about it. She closed the door behind her and took off her coat. It was warm inside and she didn't want to wear it. But first she took the note from the pocket. With the coat over her shoulder she headed up to her apartment. That door she had left open. She entered, throwing the coat over a chair and throwing the letter away before she forgot.

The apartment was empty. Black Hayate did not run up, barking and energetic, when she came home, she hadn't seen her dog since she returned and so, the room was quiet.

She removed the clip from her now windblown hair, letting the blonde tresses fall over her shoulders, messy and untamed. She looked at herself in the mirror, seeing once again, someone she knew she was not. She took out her earrings, one by one. She looked at herself once again before she undressed. She wanted to take a shower, a nice long one, and wash away the cold and the emptiness.

As the water ran through her hair, down her back, and over the scars she had forgotten that she had, Hawkeye fell into her own thoughts, those that she had been trying to avoid. She remembered everything that had happened before the battle, except for the way things felt. The way things just were. She knew there must have been a reason why she had been so contented before, driven, motivated, filled with some sort of purpose. It was the reason she bothered to work so hard and act so strictly, the reason she joined the military in the first place. She knew she had a calling, but in the confusion, she must have forgotten what it was. It felt like the answer was right in front of her, perpetually on the tip of her tongue. She couldn't place it, however, no matter how hard she tried. It was a hard thing to lose.

She finished, drying her hair and running her fingers through it to make sure it was straight and even this time. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Her tattoo was covered in burns she convinced herself were injuries from the war, when the building collapsed and she had thought she was going to die. Of course she hadn't remembered that, since she had passed out. She pulled a shirt over her head. She was going to sleep in her clothes tonight.

The telephone rang, breaking the quiet. Riza picked up the phone receiver from the table near her bed, and sat on the mattress as she spoke.

"Hello?" she asked "Who is this?"

"Lieutenant Hawkeye."

"Can I help you?"

"This is Colonel Roy Mustang"

"Yes sir?"

"I called to inform you that I've spoken with Brigadier General Mya. I've been informed that the army we fought at the southern border those months ago has regrouped, and is staging a second wave of attacks. There's a possibility, a rather high one, in fact, that we may be sent back to the front. I wanted to make sure you were prepared."

Riza nodded "Is that all, sir?"

There was a pause. "Lieutenant," he said "I also wanted to ask if you were doing alright, and if there was anything I could do."

Riza was shocked. That was almost too thoughtful. In truth, she was anything but alright. But she didn't feel it was her place to ask a superior officer to let her cry in front of him. They weren't close, after all, and what she needed was a confidante. She smiled, however, at his proposal. "No sir,"' she lied. "I'm fine. When are we leaving?"

"Within the next week." The colonel responded.

"Alright sir." She responded.

"Good night, Lieutenant Hawkeye." he said.

She didn't respond. "Good night" hardly seemed like the proper thing to say. Somehow it seemed out of place. She wanted to say something, but didn't, and the colonel hung up before she was able to invent anything to answer with.

War, she thought, we're going back to war. She tried not to think about it. She pulled the covers over herself and prayed her dreams wouldn't be filled with bloodshed. She wasn't afraid the last time, but things had changed since then. Going back to the place that had changed them, with nobody there to protect her, she felt scared. The most she could hope was that whatever part of herself she had left there, would meet up with her again.

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**THIS IS BRIGGS!!!!! --- reason behind that? its snowing where we are today. please reveiw!**


	12. Chapter 12

**IDK when I am going to actually post this. I finished it tuesday but i allready posted at least one maybe two chapters today. And idealy i will post this along with chapter 13. You never can tell with me and my life. Anyway, this really really really really really really needs reveiws. please? i get no response from you people! i need more. just so i know that you are still with me. even if you are on the phone, get on for 10 seconds and send me a three word reveiw. even flames are fine! i just need imput!**

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Mustang reported to the General's tent to get the orders for the day. He accepted the envelope that was handed to him with the orders. Brigadier General Mya came over to him, "Let's hope this is as easy as it was the first time around. Are you ready Mustang?"

The Flame Alchemist nodded as he walked out of the crowded tent with his superior, "I just hope that the death toll doesn't get as high this time through."

"Yes," Mya agreed. "That would be nice. I trust you to do your best and help us win this war."

Mustang continued to his tent, leaving the General, "Don't worry, sir. My team and I are willing to do our part. Best of luck."

Once he was inside the safety of the tent Roy sighed and fell to his knees. His head was killing him. Every noise made him shrink back in pain. Every day was practically a living hell being in this state. Everything reminded him that he was on borrowed time. Every little thing bothered him. And to make it worse, everyone was obsessively worrying about him. Well, practically everyone; just not the one person that he really wished he could talk to about this. But he couldn't tell her anything, it would just make the ending harder. He almost wished that his time was up just so he could escape this nightmare. Almost; he hadn't given up quite yet.

He reluctantly pulled himself back on to his feet; he could hear his team coming. He had told Havoc that he would let them know when to worry, but they didn't buy it. Eyes of concern from his men followed him around the office constantly. They didn't need to see him like this before a battle.

"Sir," Hawkeye said from behind him, "We're ready when you are." Mustang nodded, not trusting his voice. He opened the envelope and read through the orders quickly. He put them in his pocket and turned to face the others, "Shoot to kill but let them make the first move. It's all basically standard."

Colonel Mustang stepped out of the tent and looked around. He needed Hawkeye to be in a good place, but he didn't want to tell her where to go. "Hawkeye, go find a safe place to give us cover."

She saluted, "Best of luck to you in battle sir." He flinched at those words; the words he had _never_ wanted to hear her say ever again. Those had been the last words that he had ever heard her say before her death last battle.

"Same to you Lieutenant," he said as he saluted her back after a moment for him to regain his composure. He watched her go. He sighed, this was better than not having her at all, but he still missed how things used to be.

Mustang turned around and jumped. His men all had an expression of "you have got to be kidding me" on their faces.

"What are your real orders?" Havoc asked smartly, "You normally tell us something along the lines of "if you die I will hurt you" or "if something happens save yourselves""

Mustang smiled, they never let him forget anything, "Don't die. I don't have the means to bring you back." The others saluted him, giving him a moment of pride over his amazing team. "Come on," he said "Now that we know what we are up against this won't take too long." Just then the sounds of gun fire filled the air. The battle had begun.

Roy Mustang led the team as they took the offense yet again. The new troops they were up against seemed to have an attack plan that was drastically slower than the army sent before them. The Flame Alchemist concentrated all of his mind power he could muster. With each attack he made, a stabbing pain hit him hard in the head. Secretly he hoped that it wouldn't be too much. He couldn't even afford to flinch at the pain. They were in a war.

After about what Mustang guessed to be about half an hour of nonstop battling, the team reached a safe trench for them to catch their breath. Mustang checked to make sure that his team was okay before he let himself catch his breath. Now that he wasn't fighting he would expect the headache to go away, but it didn't. With each explosion he could feel his head scream in agony. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing so as to calm himself down.

_He saw the Gate, wide open, as if it was his inviting him to come closer. The Being sat just inside the door, a taunting smile across its face. It reached out a hand towards him, "Want to come now and save yourself the trouble?"_

_"No," Mustang said determined, "I won't come until I have no choice. I won't give up." _

_"Fine," the Being said as the Gate started to close between the two, "It won't be too long now. I can wait. I was just giving you one last option."_

"COLONEL!" Mustang woke to the sounds of Fuery's shouts. "Thank goodness you're awake! Are you okay?"

Mustang looked up into the faces of Havoc, Fuery, Breda and Falman all surrounding him. How did he end up on the ground? "What happened?"

"We aren't sure," Falman said looking at the others. "You sort of just passed out without warning."

Mustang struggled to get to his feet, his hand pressing down into the ground. Wait, the ground shouldn't move like that. He looked into the sky and groaned. The sky was dark and grey except for the flashes of light from the war.

"Damn, how long has it been raining?"

"Not too long, it started and stopped very quickly," Breda reported. "It poured for a minute or two. It let up right before you woke up." They helped the sopping wet Flame Alchemist get to his feet. His entire body ached, which was probably why he didn't notice the rain on him at first. The team looked at him warily.

"Maybe we should head back?"Fuery suggested.

"No," Mustang barked. "This is why they took their time in making their attack. They knew that I wouldn't be a threat if it was raining, and that would increase their chances of success. I wont give them that satisfaction. Havoc, give me your lighter!"

Havoc shook his head, spraying water droplets everywhere, "No sir."

"What?" Mustang rounded on him. He stopped moving, because he was making himself sick moving that fast, but kept glaring profoundly at the man.

"I said no."

"Aren't you a subordinate? We are at war! Do not disobey your commanding officer," Mustang shouted. "Now give me the lighter!"

"No," Havoc said, squaring up to the Colonel. "You can court martial me if you must, but I won't do it! With all due respect you are in no shape to continue! Your eyes aren't focusing well; you shouldn't be here! Take the rain as nature's way of telling you enough's enough!"

Breda, Falman and Fuery stood silently watching the two soldiers. They hadn't voiced their opinions but they looked like they would back up Havoc no matter what.

"Listen, as much as I appreciate how much you care for me I can take care of myself. I will let you know when I need to stop. And right now we are not stopping. Now give me the damn lighter!"

"What part of no do you not grasp?" Havoc asked throwing his arms in the air.

"I can keep going!"

Havoc yelled in Mustang's face, "Not in this shape! You don't want to face the fact that you aren't as strong as you once were! Don't go making this difficult!"

"I'm not. I am trying to do my job!" Mustang yelled. The two officers were now only inches away from each other. Mustang was ready to punch the man and Havoc was ready to fight back.

"HEY!" Fuery interrupted. The two feuding soldiers stopped and turned to face the other three. Their eyes were full of worry. "Please listen to me."

Mustang took a step back and held his head in his hands. The world was spinning around him making things even more infuriating. "Sir," Fuery said as he approached the Flame alchemist. "We don't want anything to happen to you. Ever since we had to deal with Hawkeye's death things have been hard. The only thing that pulled all of us though this is you. We believed that if you could find a way to deal with the loss then the rest of us could too. But if we lose you, what do we do then? We don't want to have to deal with loosing you too, not this close to the relief of having Hawkeye back with us."

Mustang looked up at Fuery. The young Master Sergeant was soaking wet complete with water droplets clinging to his glasses. The entire team seemed worried and tired, it was unacceptable. The sounds of war came to Mustang's attention. They couldn't stop here, and not now of all times. It was too dangerous.

"Please, give me the lighter. We can head back, but I need something so that I can help because we will have to fight our way back," Mustang said as he straightened himself up.

Havoc looked at the Colonel intently for a moment. He sighed, pulled out the lighter and handed it over to the Flame Alchemist, "Please don't overdo it."

Mustang took the lighter and looked at his men. Aside from being wet, they were ready for the worst. And the worst shouldn't be too bad, he decided, since they was going back to camp like they had asked.

As Mustang led them slowly back in the direction of the camp, his attacks grew more vicious than ever before. The reason why he had agreed to go back was that they were so far into the battle that it would take them a while to get back. And that allowed him enough time to make a lot of damage. Havoc, Breda, Falman, and Fuery all fought admirably beside him. There were even a few kills that Roy could easily tag as Hawkeye's work.

With each attack, Mustang could tell he grew weaker. The headache was now constantly at its worst and he had to fight to not become dizzy now. But he wasn't at his limit, he could keep going. He would prove that he was capable of much even while he was in the state he was.

It took them a while to move far. Roy Mustang ran up and made a clean attack at a canon before it had the chance to fire. He could hear the rest of his men running to catch up with them. He smiled, he could see the camp now on the other side of the field.

Once they were all together he looked at his team. "I'm going to create a fire big enough that it could give us enough time to cross the field. Stick close." The team nodded in understanding. The Flame Alchemist took a deep breath and acted.

The action was successful; they made it back to their camp. Havoc turned to the Colonel, "I'll take my lighter back." Mustang handed it over. The others walked in front of their commanding officer, heading back to their tent to dry off.

Mustang watched them go into the tent and sighed. He was glad that they had made it back in one piece, even if he didn't like that they left before it was done.

Just then, the Colonel became dangerously light headed. He needed to sit down someplace that his team wouldn't notice. Mustang stumbled behind the tent. It was backed up close to the back of another making a slender ally way. He sunk to his knees in pain. The world was whirling around him, the sharp pain in his head like a knife. He wanted to scream, but he kept it clenched his mouth shut. He didn't want the others to know that they were right.

The pain was making the faint light from the battle blinding. Roy curled himself into the fetal position on the ground. He covered his ears and shut his eyes trying to lose everything. The darkness wasn't dark enough, the quiet not quiet enough. It took all of his will power not to scream out, not to shout. This truly was a living hell.

After what seemed like hours, the sounds around him faded into a blissful silence. All pain he had felt was magically gone. He opened his eyes, and gasped. All around him, there was nothing but a blinding white light.

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**Now let me clarify, the story is not, repeat NOT over yet. REVEIW AND KEEP READING! ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK! (ok maybe it is...)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello people. It was a snow day again, so i completed another chapter today. Um... The two points of veiw can be seen as different not only by who is in the conversation, but mustang is in italized. Um.... sadly i am now on my own with where this is going. I am trying not to tell Masta and Mizu more than allready known, but because they listen to me talk this out to myself they not only realize that my helpers are a nickle to flip and my ipod which mocks me. Mizu: Yeah, theaterinspired is a bit crazy. Masta: wait? what do we know that the readers dont? theater: uh... you dont need to know that. If anything you guys have a bunch of guesses which are correct and a bunch that are not. Sadly i can never keep you two too much in the dark because i need characterization help. and i would know what the readers are guessing if the WOULD ACTUALLY REVEIW FOR ONCE!!! Masta: Hey! I do reveiw! Theaterinspired: Not you. the others. anyway, i got to go.... my APUSH essay wont write itself and i have practice tomorow... so here ya go!**

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_Mustang looked around and swore. Sitting in front of him was The Being with the same gloating presences as ever. _

_"Damn," Roy cursed as he pulled himself to his feet. "What happened? Am I dead now or is this just one of your annoying things you do just to spite me?"_

_"Well," the Being started tilting its head at the Alchemist, "You aren't dead, not yet anyway. I normally pull people through the Gate just a second before they die so that they don't go through the physical pain, but with you I had to make an exception. I wanted you to see this from a point where you can understand what's happening to not just you but some other important people." _

_Mustang took a step back, trying to gain some distance between him and the Being, "What are you going to do?"_

_"I am simply allowing things to take their present course," The Being said. "In all technicalities it was you who decided how this was going to occur." The Being pointed out towards the left of Mustang, "Watch and see what happens when you mess in my domain."_

_Mustang's eyes grew wide as he watched the space the Being was pointing to go dark. Slowly shapes and colors came into the area until he could recognize the scene. It was Hawkeye, up in what seemed to be the second story of a building. _

---

Hawkeye sat at her post in the run down building, snipping the enemy, dropping their numbers one soldier at a time. She had been keeping track of her teammates, but for an unknown reason they had come back to the camp. She could only guess it was because of the rain, but even then the Alchemist had still been using his abilities even in the rain.

She stayed in her position; she had left a note in the tent of where she would be if they needed her. She knew that they would find it, she had watched Havoc, Fuery, Breda and Falman all enter the tent to get out of their soaked clothes. It had rained very hard for a few minutes earlier making her visibility right down to nothing. That had been when she had a moment of panic because she had lost sight of the team. But once she found them she focused on their protection yet again.

Hawkeye stretched. It was funny; she had seen them all enter their tent except for the Colonel. Where could he be? Seeing as how her job was to protect him she started to look for him. She didn't think that he was in any real danger, but she wouldn't want to be wrong and get in trouble for it later.

---

_Mustang tore his eyes away, it was odd how he could tell what she was thinking, what she was feeling. It wasn't because they were so close, but almost as if part of her was there._

_"What are you trying to do?" he asked the Being. "What am I looking for?"_

_"Just shut up and enjoy the show. Things are about to get interesting."_

---

Panic was filling her, she couldn't find him. What if something had happened to him? She took a few deep breaths. This was not the end of the world. Logically she should start at the last place she saw the man and then move from there. The tent, or directly outside of it, was where she had last seen him, but he had not gone in. She started looking around there.

Just then, her eyes grew wide and she gasped. It came back, like a wave trying to pull her under with the current. She saw herself sitting in her house as a teenager, bring tea to her father and him. She saw herself in her room, sobbing because of the emptiness of her father's death with his arm over her shoulder trying to comfort her. She saw herself at the grave, offering to help him reach his goals. She saw herself in her dorm at the academy studying for her exams, reminding herself of why she was there. She saw herself in Ishbal, shooting to protect. She saw herself graduating. She saw all of her past; she remembered it.

---

_"Wait!" Mustang exclaimed as panic filled his voice, "She remembers all of that? Does she remember her death?"_

_"No, she doesn't remember that much yet. I just gave her back her early memories. Her death and what happened here in the gate is still unknown to her. She just remembers you now," the Being explained without turning his attention away from the scene._

---

Hawkeye jumped at the sudden recollection. She shook her head, it didn't matter now. Everything could be explained to her later. Right now, she couldn't find Mustang, and that was the issue. She kept looking but had no luck in finding him.

Riza stood up and swung her gun over her shoulder. This was ridiculous, it was out of character for him to just disappear without telling anyone, so she figured that she would go down to the tent and ask if they knew.

She sprinted down the stair of the building taking them two at a time. Just as her foot hit the last stairs she stopped. She felt sick. She realized that it wasn't a physical sickness as much as it was a gut feeling that something horrible was happening. She closed her eyes, and let her mind wander. Her father had taught her that if you ever had this feeling and you let your mind wander then you would find the answer to what it was that caused the sensation to begin with.

It didn't take too long. It was Roy. Something was wrong.

She sprinted out of the building and headed towards the tent. Suddenly, right before she came to the tent, she heard the sounds of three gunshots coming from behind the tent.

---

_"And in case you wanted to know," the Being said finally turning towards Mustang. "You are now dead. I hope you are happy with what you did because you are not going back."_

_"What?!"_

---

Her heart thumped loudly with adrenaline. She sprinted to the back of the tent. She could hear others following her, but she was faster because she hadn't spent the energy in the battle.

Hawkeye rounded the corner and stopped in her tracks. Roy Mustang laid on the ground, a pool of blood slowly forming around him. She ran to him trying to keep her head. This couldn't be it, not like this.

Riza fell to the ground beside him, her legs giving way under her. "Colonel!" she yelled. She tried desperately to roll him over. She needed to help. "Damn it Roy Mustang, speak to me!"

She looked him over, the hot tears already starting to fill her eyes. He had been shot three times; once in the hand, back and head. She knew from her training what the results would be. He would have died in an instant.

---

_"Wait one minute," Mustang said to the Being. "I'm now dead. And she remembers our past but not anything about her death or the Gate?"_

_"Yes, can't you keep up with the story?" the Being replied becoming annoyed at the man._

---

Shouting caught Hawkeye's attention. She didn't look up but she could tell what was happening. Breda and Havoc were wrestling with someone. "Who are you? Why did you do this?" Breda demanded.

"I infiltrated your lines to kill the man for the fire attacks. I am…"

"Shut up!" Havoc growled, kicking the man to make his point.

"No! You will see that you are all idiots for crying over that monstrosity. Especially you lady. Don't you realize that it's too late? He is dead and gone. He probably went to Hell…"

BANG! There was a single gunshot causing the enemy spy to drop dead. The close gun fire had caused Riza to jump. She finally looked up.

Falman put his gun away. "Sorry, but I couldn't allow for him to continue like that."

Breda nodded, letting go of the spy's body so that it fell limply to the ground in a heap. "He was technically an enemy that put all of us in danger. Our standing orders are to kill him."

---

"_At least she didn't shoot him. That would be on the sense of revenge. Surely you didn't want her to be turned into someone like that."The Being turned to Mustang, "I wish you could see your face. You look sick."_

_Mustang clenched his fist, "You are a sick twisted being."_

_The smile grew, "Oh you have no idea what you are dealing with."_

---

Riza returned her gaze back to her superior. She wanted to scream and let it all come out of her. Her hands absent mindedly stroked those of the dead Colonel. She stared into his dark unseeing eyes; the eyes of the man she had loved silently for so long.

She brushed his hair to the side. Her tears kept coming no matter how much she wanted them to stop. He had always hated the rain. He was dead. She had failed to protect him like she had promised that she would.

Riza laid her head down on his unmoving chest. Emptiness consumed her. She noticed that the shot in his back ended up coming all the way though him and left though his shirt pocket. She pulled open his jacket to get to the pocket. Her fingers found their way into the pocket where she felt two familiar pieces of metal. One of them was the bullet that had helped to kill him. She left it in the pocket and pulled out the other piece. Her hands were now covered in his blood, but she didn't care.

Hawkeye inspected the other thing that had been in his pocket. She recognized it as the key to her apartment, now covered in blood.

---

_Mustang collapsed to his knees, "I can't keep watching."_

_"I'm not giving you a choice Mr. Al-chem-ist. You tried to mess in my domain; you get the full glory of it. Action and reaction, isn't it beautiful?" the Being said harshly._

---

New sobs consumed her, causing her to collapse over his body. She wanted to die with him.

Riza reached to her holster but her gun wasn't there. She picked up her head and frantically looked around for it. It had to be around somewhere.

She felt an arm around her. She looked over and saw Fuery kneeling next to her. Breda leaned over and closed the eyes of the Flame Alchemist. Roy Mustang now looked as if he had fallen into a peaceful sleep that they had seen so often in the office.

Hawkeye kept looking around. She needed her gun; she needed to die here with him.

"You won't find it," Havoc said quietly. "I took it. I won't let you end your life here too."

---

_"What?" Mustang asked, "No! No. She is driven to suicide, just like that?"  
The Being shrugged, "She loved you. She always has. What would you expect her to do?" _

_"I would want her to keep going without me," he said still in shock, "I wouldn't want her to give up because I am not there."_

_"But do you honestly think, even for a minute, she wouldn't want to go with you?" the Being asked. "You are all she had left in the world. If it wasn't for you, she never would have lived the way she did. Didn't you ever once question why she did what she did?"_

_Mustang closed his eyes. Of course he had wondered what had made her join the military or give him her father's secrets, but he would never ask those questions. _

_"She did everything because she cared about you and wanted to help you," the Being said quietly. "Now that you are gone, she questions what is left for her to do."_

_Mustang looked back at the scene and watched. He was glad that someone had thought ahead of her, but he wasn't sure it would stop her for long. He hoped it was._

---

"I can't go on," she said between her sobs.

"We know that you feel that way," Falman said, "But you can. We will help."  
The men worked together to drag her to her feet. She was fighting against them, she wanted to stay. But they knew that she would feel worse if they left her there with him. "Come on," Breda said after she was standing with some support. "We need to report to General Mya."

Havoc let them go, "I'll catch up with you guys. I'm going to wait for someone to come." Once they were out of sight he took the white sheet he had gone to get once he had heard Hawkeye start screaming. Her screams were all he had needed to know right then that the Colonel was gone. He carefully covered his friend's body.

"That wasn't even a month," he whispered. "And now she wants to die too. I hope you knew what you were doing. I will do everything in my power to make sure that the price you paid won't be wasted."

---

_"You…" Mustang muttered, glaring profoundly at the Being, "Have you no heart?"_

_The Being stood. It scolded Roy with a very loud and booming voice making the mortal shrink back a little, "You brought this on yourself. You had been warned that human transmutation was something you shouldn't try to do. I was nice; I let you succeed because you wanted to so badly. Admittedly I was curious as to how things would play out. Now you understand that everything you do will affect something else. She was supposed to die saving you; that was a way that made her happy. She had made that decision._

_"But then some alchemist tries to bring her back. He doesn't get it. The only way for him to understand is to learn the hard way. Now that you died before her she has lost everything. If anyone here has no heart it is you!" _

_"Do I have no choice?" Mustang whispered, "Is there no mercy to her even though it was my mistake?" _

_"You will watch how this ends," the Being said coldly, "I am being merciful in the only way I can. I now have no choice but to clean up after your mess." _

_

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_**So yeah, i am a little annoyed at the colonel myself. but i cant keep it for long. so there you go. Riza Eats Very Edible Indigo Watermelons! YEAH I AM RANDOM! :D**


	14. Chapter 14

**aw... that was sad wasnt it? hehe.... i wish i could tell you that this is better, but its not. just accept the fact. this chapter took a few tries for me to write. but here it is. and ya know how i was looking at fifteen chapters? well its going to be sixteen. yes, that number does bother me but becsquared decided that she wants to write a chapter, so she gets the next one. then ill wrap it up and we will have an author's note party. whoohoo! im gonna let you read this and stop rambling. oh yeah! REVEIW!!!!!!**

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_Mustang sat next to the Being. It had been a few days on Earth and Mustang had been stuck watching the time pass slowly. It had been hard to watch, but he had to. The only relief he had was when Riza was asleep and he could just watch her sleep. _

_The Being was still obviously annoyed with Mustang. It hadn't said too much to him since his death. They had been watching in silence. The only thing that had been said was when the Being turned and asked, "Do you want it to rain at your funeral?"_

"_What?" Mustang said a little surprised by the question._

"_Some people like it to rain on the day that they are laid to rest. I just was giving you the choice," the Being said quietly._

"_No rain," Mustang shook his head, "I hate the rain, and they know it. She doesn't need the reminder."_

----

The wind blew gently, causing the white blossoms of the nearby trees to float gracefully to the earth. It had stopped raining every day, letting the glory of spring break through the ground. The sun shone brightly, bringing all of the different shades of colors to life. There was a slight haze overshadowing the mountains far off in the distance. It was almost beautiful.

Riza Hawkeye stood silently in line with Fuery, Breda and Falman all next to her and Havoc directly behind. The cemetery was peaceful, just as it should be, except for the feeling of sadness in the air. Hawkeye stood with the military in the standard uniform for such a serious occasion. She wore her uniform, but with her skirt that she refused to wear on a normal basis. The black sash was around her, the sign of dignified respect for the fallen soldiers. She hated it.

Hawkeye was happy that it wasn't raining today. That would just make it worse that it was horrible weather on the last day. The nice weather made her feel more at peace with what she was going to do now that her leader would be laid to rest. She could, and would, follow him. The best attempts of the team to stop her wouldn't work.

Her hair was blowing gently around with the breeze. She wished that she had been more careful at the camp. After she had gone to see General Mya during the battle in the south, she had tried to make another attempt to follow her leader. When she had reached her tent she had picked up the spare gun that she had left in her bag. She had almost succeeded that time, except Havoc, Breda and Falman came in before she could pull the trigger. Riza had fought hard against them as they tried to pull her apart from the gun, but the combined strength of Havoc and Falman was stronger than she was. She had succeeded in breaking one of Breda's arms, but other than that she hadn't made enough damage to get her way. She had broken her hair clip during the fight too. It was the last one she had had, and she hadn't been allowed to go get one by herself yet. Therefore her hair stayed down.

---

_Mustang couldn't help but smile at her. Even though he was unhappy with what had happened so that her hair clip broke, he was happy it had. He always preferred her hair down, though he never told her that. He never told her a lot of things._

_He was mad that she was continually trying to plan her death. It was not what he wanted, but he couldn't stop her from here._

_He turned to the Being, "By the way, when are you going to send back her memories of the Gate?"_

"_When I want to," the Being snapped. "Can we just watch your funeral in respect?"_

"_Why?" Mustang asked._

"_Its symbolic of more than the end of you," it said, obviously annoyed, "You don't get it, so just let it go. And keep quiet before I do something evil."_

_Mustang rolled his eyes, "Like killing me?"_

"_I could do worse, just don't ask."_

---

Riza stood in the lineup of military personnel and watched as the casket was processed to the place where Roy Mustang would be laid to rest. The nation's flag was on top of it, as it would be for any soldier that passed away. His hat lay solemnly on top of it. Hawkeye didn't want to keep watching it but she couldn't help it. It was a painful reminder that he had left before he could make it to the top. He had left before he had the chance to make the difference he had hoped to.

As it passed she held her breath, trying to stabilize herself. If she wanted to do what she did, the others needed to think that she was now okay. This was not the time for her to have yet another breakdown. They were already on edge and ready to stop her in her chosen path.

At the same time as everyone else, she saluted the fallen hero of the Ishbalan War. Stupid war, that's all that they ever had in the nation. He had wanted to change the nation, but because of one person that was now never going to happen. One shot, or in this case three, could alter not just one life but many. That was why she had resolved to only take one more life with her own hands.

Hawkeye watched as they placed the casket in the ground and started to throw the dirt on top. It took all of her self-discipline not to fall to the ground right there. Her heart was screaming in agony, but she kept it in. If everything went as planned, the goodbye wouldn't be forever.

Just as the last of the hard dirt was placed over top of his final resting place, Riza jumped.  
Seven guns were shot three times each in a twenty one gun salute. That was her limit; tears blurred her vision yet again. She fell to her knees, putting her hands in front of her to stop herself from falling all the way. Why did it have to be three shots?

---

_Mustang's eyes were wide, "That was stupid on someone's part."_

"_Well, yes I quite agree," the Being nodded, "But humans just have to follow tradition, even if its pointless in the end."_

"_It's comforting," Roy argued._

_The Being laughed, "Yeah, I see how comforting it is for her."_

---

Riza felt a hand on her back. She looked up at Havoc, his face was unemotional and blank. "Come on," he said helping her to her feet. "Let's go."

She nodded and allowed for him to lead her away. She looked over her shoulder keeping her eyes on his grave until it was out of sight.

"Where do you want to go?" Havoc asked, now putting his hands in his pocket.

"I want to go home and change," she said after a moment.

"Fine," he replied, "I'll call Fuery. He'll meet us there."

Riza glared at Havoc, "You know I don't need a babysitter."

He laughed, "I've seen evidence to the contrary. We aren't going to let you go do something stupid."

"I won't do anything stupid."

He stopped, "By who's measures? I won't let you follow him this time. Not in this way."

"I do have enough common sense to know what you would think of me trying to follow him," she said stopping as well. _But I will if I have to, _she thought.

"We aren't taking those chances," he said. Havoc looked out towards the road, "Come on, Falman's waiting with the car."

"Remind me why I can't drive?"

"For the same reason why one of us is with you at all times. For the same reason I took your guns. For the same reason you have nothing sharp left in your apartment. For the same reason you broke Breda's arm. For the same reason your medicine cabinet is empty…" Havoc listed as he walked down the walkway.

"When did you go through my medicine cabinet?" she asked. They were really getting on her nerves, trying to control her.

He shrugged, "Fuery thought to do it last night."

---

"_Thank you team!"Mustang said in relief._

"_I have to agree, your men seem ready to do what they know you wanted them to," the Being said, "I am interested in who will come out on top. Will she get her way, or will you though the acts of your team?"_

---

"It's been four days," she pointed out. "Don't you think that I would have already done something if I was ever going to?"

Jean Havoc turned and looked Riza in the eyes, "The team cannot suffer another blow." He grabbed her arm and led her to the car a little faster, "We can't lose you again."

"Again?" she pulled her arm away from him and took a step away from the car. "What do you mean again?"

He closed his eyes. He had forgotten that she still didn't remember what Mustang had done to bring her back to life. They had been debating if they should just tell her to save themselves the trouble, but there was a chance that it would just increase her desperation. "Nothing. It's nothing," he said pushing her into the car.

---

"_You look sad, Al-che-mist," the Being taunted._

_The Colonel's eyes were wide, "I don't know what I would want. Do they tell her, and risk that then she becomes more depressed? Or do they not tell her and let things take its course?"_

_A smile grew wide on the Being. It had been a while since it had smiled like that before, "I guess you will just have to hope for the best."_

_---_

Once they made it back to her apartment, Hawkeye went to grab her clothes to change into. Havoc went into the kitchen to call Fuery. Riza looked around the corner to make sure that the other lieutenant was busy on the phone. He was arguing in a hushed tone, which would give her enough time to slip out for a little.

Riza had a plan, the only question was if it would work or not. She would head to one of the last places that they would ever think to look for her. There would sure to be something there that she could use. She had been careful and taken the key from Falman the other night when he had fallen asleep on the couch watching her. She had known that finding the key would be no big deal; he was their superior, therefore they would be the ones with the orders to clean the place out before family was allowed inside.

She grabbed the book that had been open on her desk for who knew how long, and went to the bathroom. Riza quickly changed into a pair of khaki pants and a pastel pink dress shirt. If anyone saw her they wouldn't question it. Riza picked up the book and flipped to the second page. She took a deep breath and grabbed the pen that she had put in her uniform pocket. She let her hand glide across the page,

Sorry, but I couldn't help but follow. I had promised him that I would. Even if he went to hell, I will follow. Don't blame yourselves, its my choice. But I do admire how hard you tried to stop me. I am thankful that I got to call you my team.

She sighed and turned back to the first page, already full of her writing. She had had a note already there that explained everything more in dept, just in case she ever needed it. She placed the book on the ground in obvious sight.

Hawkeye walked over to the window and opened it. She lived on the second story of the complex and a fire escape was right there. She hopped out of the window and closed it gently behind her, the key to Mustang's house held tightly in her hand.

Lieutenant Hawkeye walked away from her home at a brisk pace, never looking back. What she wanted to do was easy, but doing it was a little more complicated if the others found her.

She soon found herself by the river. It was moving fast today, the rain from the past few weeks trying rushing past. She looked down and saw herself reflected back. Her eyes were still a little red from crying, but other than that she seemed fine. She looked determined and set; she was never going back. Her golden hair still fell to her shoulders. She hadn't noticed that tiny white flower petals from the blossoms from the tress at the cemetery had entwined themselves in her hair.

Riza looked at the key in her hand for a moment. What was she waiting for? Her heart, thumped louder with each step. Did it know that she was going to silence it soon? She closed her hand tightly around the key and ran towards the direction of Mustang's home.

She walked in the front door and sighed. It smelled like him, a mix of burnt paper and cinnamon. She felt calm and at piece with what she was about to do. The odds were that the team hadn't thought of her running here of all places and she hadn't said exactly where she was going. They would assume that she would go to a place that she would be reminded of him, but to come to his home was probably last on the list.

She looked around, trying to find a gun. He had to have had one somewhere around there, she just wasn't sure exactly where. She started in his bedroom. She went through all of the drawers. Her hands found a pair of his gloves. She sighed and smiled. Hawkeye remembered talking to him when he was trying to decide how to create the sparks whenever he wanted. She actually remembered the entire ordeal of trying to help him learn the alchemy. But sadly she didn't know the alchemy required to do that to herself.

Riza went through the kitchen next. Knives were there, but she would rather find a gun. They were more natural to use. She kept looking, if worse came to worse, that would be her back up plan.

After about ten minutes she found it. It was in a drawer that was part of a table just inside the entry way. The table had a date book sitting on top of it, right next to the wilting single rose in a glass. She slid to the ground. She quickly checked the gun and smiled, it had one bullet left.

Hawkeye looked at the gun. Just then, the same sensation she had had when they were in battle and she remembered her past came back to her. She saw herself arguing with the cadet to leave her. She saw the building being consumed by flames. She saw him running towards the building. She saw the white light, the Truth, the Gate.

Then she remembered talking to him in the Gate. She had hit him, twice, for letting himself break to the point of bringing her back against all rules of alchemy. She remembered scolding him. She remembered him kissing her, and then saying that he loved her. And she remembered kissing him back and telling him that she loved him too.

Tears came for the last time. Was this what they had been keeping from her? The fact that Mustang had been stupid enough to bring her back after she had died made her mad. And the price had turned into his untimely death. Didn't he remember that she had told him, many times, that she would follow him into hell if he went? She had to go with him; she refused to be left behind.

---

_"Don't do it," Mustang prayed. "This is not what I meant by that I will leave you behind so that you have someone to catch up to."_

_"Well yes," the Being said. "I know that and you know that. Chances are that she does too, but I don't think she cares what you meant. She seems desperate."_

---

She cocked the gun and put it in her mouth. She expected to feel panic, to start to argue with her over this life ending choice, but it never came. This was what she wanted. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Thoughts of him consumed her; he would be mad at her. She didn't care. All that she was doing was stalling, giving time for the others to come and stop her.

Just then there was a knock at the door. Havoc's worried voice came through, "Riza! Are you in there?!"

She ignored him, the door was locked. She took another deep breath and pulled the trigger. She heard the sounds of the team yelling muffled by the bang of the gun as she fell to the floor and into a familiar white light.

---

_"Well, you can go get her if you want," the Being said stretching._

_Mustang stood there gawking. He was still in shock at how things had occurred. She had just thrown her life away and hadn't had any regrets. He shook his head, "I'll go get her."_

_"That's what is best," the Being nodded. "Sadly she has to watch things unfold for a while. It's a requirement for people that commit suicide."_

_"Wait," Mustang said turning around, "You said that you would be merciful. How exactly do you explain that?"_

_"I won't explain that to you," the Being said, waving him on, "You will see in a minute what I did." _

_

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_

**Whoop whoop! how do you like me now? now that im on my way. you still think im crazy stading here today.... wow random country song reference. im tired from staying up to watch the fma brotherhood dubbed premire so im gonna go take a nap and start working on my ending. :D**


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey everyone that is still with me. The easiest explination of why this took so dang long is by introducing, BecScquared! Say hi bec! Bec: hiya! im glad to finally be included in this tea party! me: well, bec took forever to write this. Bec: sorry, im a senior this year and its been crazy. me: well the good news is that if you are reading this, the next chapter will be posted either today or tomorow at the latest. Here ya go and sorry again:**

* * *

Havoc stared at the door in a panic. Desperately, he hoped that hadn't been a gun shot he had heard. Riza wasn't that desperate. He was just letting his mind get ahead of him. He was paranoid. Reality beat him down. The lieutenant had already tried several times to follow Mustang. He renewed the pounding on the door with fresh vigor.

"Riza! Open the damn door," Havoc shouted. There was no response. He tossed aside the cigarette he'd been smoking onto the wet ground. Grabbing the handle, he threw his shoulder at the door. It refused to budge. His shoulder throbbed but he ignored it. Once more, Havoc threw all of his strength and weight at the unrelenting door. In vain, he tried the handle. Something hit his thigh lightly. Havoc glanced down to see his pistol. Quick as lightning, the gun was out and the lock obliterated. Holstering the weapon, Havoc grabbed the handle and forced the door open. It stuck on the carpet, resisting his push. With a grunt, he managed to get it open enough to slip through. Inside, the house was silent and dark. The air was foreboding.

"Riza! Lieutenant Hawkeye!" Havoc moved through the house. Dread and fear followed his footsteps. He noticed things had been overturned, chairs on their sides and doors wide open. In the kitchen, drawers had been pulled out, their contents dumped into a pile on the floor. The only thing not touched were the knives. Havoc couldn't help but chuckle a little. The laughter died on his lips as a growing realization surfaced. He couldn't find Riza. Havoc dialed a number on the phone in the living room.

"Hello?"

"Fury, call Breda and Fallman. Riza is missing." Havoc worked to keep his tone level.

"What?! I though it was your time to watch her!" Fury sounded as panicked as Havoc felt.

"I know," he snapped, "Just get to Mustang's place and help me look!" Fury yelped as if Havoc had managed to slap him through the phone.

"Yes sir!" The line went dead as Fury hung up. Havoc lit a cigarette, trying to calm his nerves. The cigarette trembled in his shaking fingers and his lighter refused to work. Swearing profusely, Havoc jammed the cigarette into his mouth and used both hands to steady the lighter. Smoke finally curled around his head, clearing his mind a little.

"Geez, second lieutenant, smoking at a time like this? You must be pretty worked up," he muttered to himself, pacing. He glared at the door. Where were they? Didn't they know time was precious?

"Second lieutenant Havoc!" Havoc turned around to see Fury, Fallman and Breda in the room.

"I brought everyone to help, sir," Fury reported. He was obviously shaken, his eyes wide and brimming with tears. Fallman looked worried, glancing around and squinting more than usual. Breda carried Black Haiyate, his fear for Hawkeye's life overpowering his fear of the dog.

"What do we do, sir?" Fury asked in a low tone. Havoc sighed, emitting a cloud of smoke.

"Search the place, top to bottom. Nothing gets ignored. Shout if you find her. Fallman, start in the basement. Fury, take Black Haiyate and scour this floor. Breda, search the attic and I'll take the second floor." Havoc glanced at his team. They looked determined and ready for the worst. They saluted him which he promptly returned.

"Good luck." They fanned out rapidly. Havoc checked Mustang's room to find it completely untouched. It didn't surprise him that Hawkeye wouldn't go near this room. As he retreated from the room, barking began beneath him.

"Guys!" Fury's voice shot up the stairs, "I found her." His voice trembled slightly as he said the words. Havoc raced down the stairs with Breda hot on his heels. Fury knelt on the floor by the door, tears falling freely down his face. Black Haiyate whined pitifully, pawing at a black shape on the door. Havoc pulled out the lighter, using it as a torch. Blood was splattered on the door and a gun lay in a field of blue. Riza's finger was still on the trigger. Her blonde hair cascaded down her shoulders, the golden color marred by red. Some strands stuck to the door, giving her a halo. Riza's expression was peaceful and happy. There was even a faint smile on her face. If Havoc hadn't seen the blood, he'd have assumed she was sleeping. The flame spluttered and died the lighter heavy in his hand. He could hear Fury's sobs and felt weary and pathetic. He had failed. Watching was a woman in black. Her purple eyes surveyed the men one last time before she disappeared into the night.

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**Yes I know that it was short, but thats how she wrote it. PLEASE reveiw and yell at me for taking so long..... reveiw **


	16. Chapter 16

**Dear fans, one thing: reveiw this chapter as if your life depended on it. i NEED to hear from you.**

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"So, Mustang and Hawkeye are both dead now," Lust said coolly, turning to face the others. They were in a room that connected a series of tunnels that ran deep under Amestris; far away from prying human eyes.

"Yup," Envy said as he paced slowly around the dark underground room.

"Well, that wasn't the plan," Wrath commented harshly looking at the others.

"What did we want?" Envy asked after a moment. He had been trying for the past hour to put all of the pieces together.

"Where have you been the past month? We've been over this a million times. We wanted to get at least one other person that could open the Gate for us," Wrath said obviously annoyed, they all were.

"And we ended up with two people," a small voice said from the shadows.

"Pride," Envy said whipping towards the direction of the voice. "Why are you hiding?"

"I'm not hiding. I'm staying here because," Pride responded smartly "I can keep tabs on what Sloth's up to if I watch from here."

"Stop arguing you two," a deep, tired voice came from the middle of the room. "I need to think. Hawkeye's suicide definitely put us back a little."

"Wait," Envy shouted, "We didn't want that to happen?"

Lust stepped forward, "No, the goal was to gain someone else to help us open the gate. When Mustang died we could have worked around it by using Hawkeye. But then she went and killed herself, so that's not going to work."

"Well, I thought Lust was supposed to make sure things went to plan," Envy pointed out. "Why weren't you there?"

Lust flipped her hair, "My job was to make sure that things went well so that the human transmutation was attempted. Once that was done, things were over in Wrath's domain. Things were out of my hands."

They turned to look at Wrath. He looked determined as he addressed them, "I made sure that the Flame Alchemist didn't do anything dumb. I kept him in check while he was at military command. How was I supposed to know that he would be killed by an enemy spy during a war?"

"You didn't need to send him to the war; other people are at your disposal. So it's your fault," Envy accused.

"Well, I didn't see you do anything to help at all," Wrath argued back. "Didn't you realize that things were becoming complicated seeing as how the transmutation was successful?"

"Wait, wasn't it supposed to be successful?" Envy asked

Lust smiled, "We honestly didn't care. We really just wanted him to try. The fact that it was successful should have been a plus if anything."

Envy sat down on the floor, "And remind me again why you had to go give him the stone and be there for the transmutation?"

"Because the Flame Alchemist was more likely to respond to me than you," Lust explained.  
"Plus, if he did fail, my abilities might have proven useful to stopping him from doing something stupid like what she did in the end."

"And obviously he still accomplished something stupid," Envy muttered under his breath.

"We all misjudged what would be lost in the Gate. Just admit it," Pride said solemnly, "None of us thought that it was going to occur like that. We all should have done something different. But that's done, let's regroup now and move on."

Lust averted her eyes. She was confused though she would never admit it to the others.

"Lust," the man in the middle of the room called to her, "You seem worried. What's bothering you?"

It was annoying how the man that had created her seemed to know her feelings and thoughts especially when she didn't want to talk about it. "Nothing," she answered. "I'm just thinking. How did it happen?"

The man nodded, knowing what she meant, "They loved each other. It's the greatest strength and weakness of humans. He cared about her too much and therefore was driven to the end. She felt the same way, so the end of one meant the end of the other. It happened because they were human."

Lust's eyes were distant, "But it was all for nothing."

"Love's a stupid emotion," Pride said, "It messes with logic. That's why it's better that we don't have that emotion. But I do find it an amusing thing to watch when it comes into play with humans."

"So what now?"

"Well…" the man said slowly, "We start looking for other means to open the Gate. We have enough time to figure it out and keep the schedule."

"And we hope that this time love won't get in the way," Envy mumbled.

"No," the man corrected, "Love has helped us the most. It's what drove the Elric brothers to try and bring back their mother. It's also what made Izumi Curtis to try and resurrect her child. Love has been on our side."

"So…" Envy started as his eyes focused in concentration, "Is love a good thing for our plans or a bad thing?"

"It's good as long as we keep an eye on it so that it doesn't go out of control," the man said standing, "Thankfully we have enough time to correct this misstep, but we won't have another chance next time."

* * *

Mustang walked over to Hawkeye, who was now lying on the floor in the same position that she had fallen when she had taken her own life. Her golden hair fanned out over top of her collapsed body.

He sat cross legged next to her. He didn't say anything at first. All of his emotions were now catching up with him. He was mad, no furious, that she had given up and killed herself. He was mad that she hadn't realized that he wanted her to keep living. "Well, Hawkeye, I hope you are happy with yourself."

She slowly pulled herself up so that she was now sitting. A sad smile was across her face, "I am."

He looked away, "Don't say that. Do you realize what you just did?"

"I followed you. I told you a million times, I would follow you into hell," she replied now realizing the tone in the Colonel's voice.

"I didn't want you to do that."

Hawkeye stood, "I don't recall giving you a choice. You won my loyalty until the end."

Mustang stood up as well, "Being loyal would imply that you would respect my wishes. Besides, I thought it was you who had said that we ended the lives of countless people in Ishbal, therefore we don't have the right to choose when we end our own lives."

"And I also told you that I had no desire to spend a happy carefree life all alone," she argued back, "my corpse would leave the world together with the corpse of the flame alchemist."

They turned away from each other, they just didn't get it. "Did you think about how the others would act to this?" Mustang asked quietly.

She turned back towards him, "I know, but I hope that they understand. I understand why you are mad at me, but did you honestly see this ending any other way?"

He sighed, "You're right. I just wish things did."

Riza laughed, "You can wish and dream, but I don't think things will change now."

Mustang laughed as well, "When you spend four days here with the Being, you learn that things are out of our control here. Lesson learned, even if it's a little late; some things we can't change. "

"I am sorry that things happened this way," she said stepping to his side after a minute. "Please don't stay mad at me forever."

"I don't think I could do that," Roy said. He reached out and grabbed her hand. It calmed him down, he knew that it no longer mattered what she had done. She died for the same reason he did human transmutation. Neither one of them could live without the other. "I think I love you too much for that."

"Does that mean that this is over?" she asked quietly. "What happens next?"

He sighed, "I think the Being had said something concerning the fact that the rule is when you commit suicide you have to watch things play out on earth for a little while."

"Fine," she answered. "I don't care."

Roy laughed, "I just hope you feel that way at the end of this."

"Where are you going to go?" she asked.

"I don't know," he answered honestly, "I guess I have to see what the Being tells me to do."

Riza squeezed his hand, "Then I will catch up with you when I can."

He rolled his eyes and turned to face her with a stupid smile on his face, "Or maybe I can wait for you? What would I be rushing off to? Everything I would want is right here." He pulled her closer to him, grabbing her other hand.

She blushed as she looked into his eyes. She leaned into him so that she was against him. He wrapped his arms around her protectively. Neither one wanted to move; they could stay like this forever.

Mustang took a deep breath. Hawkeye looked up at him, her hazel eyes shining in the surrounding light.

He kissed her, this time more passionately than he had ever dared to before. She seemed to melt into him, the two of them becoming one. He could see it now, the reason why they could be together now even though they had done so much wrong. They might have needed the pressure to admit it to anyone, but they loved each other. Maybe by killing herself, Riza had given him heaven, whether or not she knew it.

He pulled lips away from hers and she laid her head on his shoulder. He smiled and started rocking back and forth. He didn't care if the Being came to break them apart, it would take a lot for Mustang to step away from this now.

"You know," he said after a moment, "all things considered, I think this worked out okay."

"As long as I'm with you," Hawkeye answered, "I wouldn't care if this was the middle of Hell."

She pulled him closer again, forcing their lips to meet once again. She sighed as she wrapped her arms around him, she wouldn't let go.

The Being smiled, from his spot across the room. He couldn't help but watch this, it was too perfect. He was far enough away that they wouldn't notice him watching over them yet again. "And they question my mercy," he thought to himself. "I don't think they will ever realize that I have always been cheering them on from the sidelines."

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**The end. well except for my awesome note... read it, it involves Truth!**


	17. Author's Note

**Theaterisnpired:** Okay so I have come to the end of another story, and a sad one at that. I am not sure if I should be happy it's over or sad. Either way it's over and that's that. I mean, as a fan girl, would you want to go over and do this whole thing over again? Um, seeing how other people helped me to write this I have invited them to help me with the author's note. We are having a session where we will discuss what they think of what I did with the story. But before I invite them in, I need to do my list of thanks.

First I would like to thank the readers for sticking with me through all of the drama I put our characters through. That means a lot that you were willing to read even though I killed them both.

Second, I would like to thank Mustang and Hawkeye for being such good sports through this whole thing. I swear it's out of respect. There needed to be a somewhat realistic Royai on the internet.

Third I would like to thank my Itunes playlists. Yes, I know you were changed so many times, at least once per chapter I wrote. Sorry, but it means a lot. Songs that were on the list included On My Own and I Dreamed a Dream from Les Mis. Other songs include Je N'ai Pas Des Mots and Nothing I Won't Give by Vic Mignogna, Leave Out All the Rest by Linkin Park, Seasons of Love from Rent, and various others that would take too long to list.

Fourth, I would like to thank my sister. Not only did she put up with me kicking her off the computer so that I could write, but she also dealt with me talking to the computer. And I owe her, and so do my other authors, for getting me the Fullmetal Alchemist CD for my birthday.

Fifth, I would like to thank Hiromu Arakawa. Without you writing the amazing things you do, for obvious reasons the fanfiction wouldn't have been done. Thanks for writing characters that are a lot of fun to write about. :D

Next is the list of things I have learned while writing this:

I can't resist challenges.

When my friends start feeding me into things, it's too late to keep going

I can't write to save my life.

I need to stop talking when I am thinking about what to write; my friends are listening to me for once

I shouldn't tell my friends what is going to happen next before I write it.

I should hand my friends a copy to read; it's much more productive and you get to see their reactions

My friends are my biggest fans and my worse critics. If something isn't 100% ready for others to read, don't hand it over to them quite yet

The best place for me to write is in my everything notebook in a little area outside of the theater at school. When you stay after school for three hours and just work there, you can write practically an entire chapter that needs very little tweaking

You can't expect too much from people. The only thing you can guarantee is your own actions.

Symbolism is fun to play around with

If I was in charge of things in Amerstis, 9 times out of 10 I think it would be raining

Writing good Royai fluff is hard, they need desperation otherwise those two would accomplish nothing

Character deaths are fun to play with

I need a life other than the internet

Mustang is my idol….. oh wait, I knew that before

Oh, I keep forgetting things I need to say! Um… as I think I said before, I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist, all though I wish I did, but its obvious now as to why I don't. I didn't say who I dedicate this to, so here's the list, even though most of them will never know that they are on this list: my bffs that are seniors, Royai fans everywhere, FMA fans everywhere, my dog, the people of Ohayocon (sign guy, greed) , my homeroom teacher, my English teacher, the people of Amestris (RIP), the upcoming end of FMA….

Now I shall turn this over to my amazing people that helped me. Masta of da House, Mizu Mitsuname, and… Truth?! Hey, who invited you?

**Truth:** You did.

**Theaterinspired:** Oh, right. I forgot. You encompass my bitchy side and were a lot of fun to write, so I did invite you.

**Truth:** Yup.

**Theaterinspired: **So what did people think of what I did with the story?

**Masta of da House:** (Enthusastically) Do you want me to tell you what I really thought, or do you want me to be cynical for the enjoyment of those reading this note?

**Theaterinspired****:** (pulls out book and pen. Flips through the book for a second) be honest.

**Truth:** Its my job to be the snide sarcastic one of this conversation. But act like I'm not even here.

**Theaterinspired:** (poses pen over paper in book,) okay, so go at it. What would you like to talk about first?

**Masta of da House****:** (raises hand) I want to bring up the metaphorical rain. It's like Amestris' weather patterns go crazy whenever Roy has a crisis.

**Truth:** (Shaking its head) That's what I get for letting fangirls play with the weather patterns. Does that mean that its always raining in Forks Washington because it's a metaphor for the writing?

**Masta of da House:** (Not hearing Truth) No, in all honesty I loved the story. It made me cry. Several times. And I appreciate that you didn't make her into a homunculus like all the other human transmutation fics do. You're writing style isn't remarkable, but your plot setup it amazingly solid. Everything wove together perfectly.

**Theaterinspired****:**(Makes a note of it) yeah I need to work on style. I like to just tell you some things that are better done with metaphors. And with the rain, it's fun. I make it rain except for the one time you think it absolutely has to. It didn't help that the weather was dreary when I wrote this, all that did was add to my use of rain...

**Masta of da House****:** You're talking about Mustang's funeral? Yeah. It was sunny. Ironic.

**Truth:** (agreeing) Even I have to admit that that was a little odd.

**Theaterinspired****: **(keeps writing) towards the end there was a lot of irony involved... :P

**Masta of da House****:** I know. Like the three gunshots.

**Truth:** yeah, especially where you shot him.

**Theaterinspired:** (glances overtop of her glasses at Truth) do you want to tell them the symbolism of that?

**Truth:** (Sarcasm) Oooh sure. (Obviously bored) Shot in the back, obvious to the whole "you can shoot me in the back" thing he has going with Hawkeye. In the hand because of the alchemy… though I still think its weak, theaterinspired.

**Theaterinspired:** anyway?

**Truth:** and the head because of how is thoughts.. Ultimately are what killed him? Oh, I see what you're thinking, he thought about her and the transmutation. Its weak symbolism.

**Theaterinspired:** (pauses) yeah, it does sound better and makes more sense in my head… moving on now…

**Masta of da House**: Hey, I have a question... Why did you make me write the most boring chapter in the fanfic? It was Riza doing nothing for 2000 words.

**Theaterinspired**: (resumed scribbling) that wasn't something that I meant to occur, it's just what ended up happening. I gave you point a and b. how you connected the dots was up to you. But hey, it needed to occur, and I didn't know Hawkeye enough to make a good prediction of her reaction to things.... sorry you feel it was pointless

**Masta of da House**: It wasn't pointless. It was just hard to write, because you gave me little to no details about what to do. But I did get a chance to make fun of your weather references. Also I wrote about her undressing and taking a shower, so I'm happy.

**Truth**: I think theaterinspired was trying to challenge you. Plus you were one of her most enthusiastic readers.

**Theaterinspired**: (More scribbling) Yeah, I couldn't let you in on things too soon, it was too much fun to watch your expression as you read what horrible things I did to them.

**Masta** **of** **da** **House**: I know. But that made it really hard to write.

**Mizu Mitsuname**: Theaterinspired, what are you writing?

**Truth:** (sarcasm) Mizu Mitsuname! Thanks for finally joining us.

**Theaterinspired:** (innocently answering the suspicious glare of Mizu) nothing.

**Mizu Mitsuname:** I don't belive you

**Theaterinspired:** Im just taking notes for the next story….

(Mizu Mitsuname stands and proceeds to pry the book out of Theaterinspired's hands by tickling her.)

**Theaterinspired:** HEY! GIVE THAT BACK!

**Mizu Mitsuname**: (reads through notes), Well… (grabs tape recorder, sounds of a fight are heard in the background growing fainter) Dear Readers, I have seen some somewhat sad news with my own eyes. Theaterinspired is next going to work on another NCIS fanfiction as her main project. She will only write oneshots for FMA and that is if people feed her idea. Otherwise she will simply be writing FMA as oneshots or to help me and Masta with our stories. So you know what to do! FEED HER IDEAS! FEED HER MIND! GET HER STARTED! SHES ADDICTED TO WRITING! QUICK BEFORE SHE STARTS HER NCIS AGAIN!!!!.....

(shuffle is heard followed by a small scream from Mizu Mitsuname.)

**Theaterinspired**: (out of breath) new subject: my title, "The Last Memories" or something likes that. Do ya get it? Is that a good title? Why?

**Masta of da House****:** (refocusing after the fight) The Last Memory. Not a bad title. Mostly relates to the first chapter, but you managed to tie it back in when you extended it.

**Truth:** (obviously not distracted by the fight) well she did mean for it to start as a oneshot. Then it extended, but the title was set.

**Theaterinspired:** (Throws hands in the air) Thank you Truth! I feel understood!

**Mizu Mitsuname****:** Can I take credit for inspiring this fanfiction? I mean, I didn't write it, but I did give you the inspiration for the first chapter and then evilly goaded you on to write more. MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! Btw, if you get her started again, I might be able to push again. Just saying.

**Masta of da House****:** Also thank Stephanie Meyer. She seems to inspire your writing Zinck, a lot of rain and bad romance.

(laughter from Masta of da House and Mizu Mitsuname breaks out)

**Truth**: (annoyed) I mentioned her earlier didn't I? Weren't you listening?

**Theaterinspired****:(Laughing)** well, Truth, you did say to act like you weren't there. stephanie meyer had nothing to do with it. the rain was a good idea in my opinion. No offense to those who love Twilight, but I have said from the beginning that it was a bad story and that I could have easily written it.

**Truth:** I can see it now, Theaterinspired: author of the next Twilight.

**Theaterinspired: **No, I'm in highschool and plan on getting better. And yes, you can take some credit for this whole thing Mizu. Even though you fed me ideas and thoughts and read the thoughts when I didn't want you to.....

And we are out of time. Thanks again to all of my amazing author helpers, and Truth as well. Please REVIEW and tell me what you thought of the story overall. Thanks and I will see you all next time :D


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